Andante

CLXXXIX

Eddy followed Veronica with his eyes as she carefully stepped down the narrow stairs, holding her violin and her bow in her right hand. She gave him a small smile when she passed him on her way back to her seat and he raised his thumb in that universal gesture that said: well done! Then Brett sighed quietly and got up. 
"Toi toi, Bretty." Eddy whispered to him, so softly he was sure none of the others would be able hear it. 
Brett would though, and he saw the tiny nod of his head. 
His love walked up the little steps Veronica had just come down, calmly made his way over to the piano and tuned his violin to the A the small pianist lady gave him. And he looked for all the world the way he always did: suave, worldly. In control. Not scared of anything. But Eddy could see the slight tension in his eyebrows, the slight squint of his loving, big koala eyes, he heard how it took him just ever so slightly longer to tune his violin than it would if it were just them. 
He smiled at him encouragingly from his seat. 
Come on, Bretty. You can do this. 
He watched as Brett moved over to the accompanist and gave her the sheet music. 
Tchaikovsky, of course. What else? First movement. Then Brett stilled in his place, looked at Mr. Petti and put his bow to his violin. 

After a few minutes Eddy remembered just how good a teacher Mr. Petti really was. Brett was playing well, thank God, but he was playing even better after a bit. It seemed that Mr. Petti could pick up on the smallest little things, seemingly inconsequential, but those subtle directions were making Brett's sound soar like Eddy had never heard before. 
He wasn't even thinking about the fact that he was up next, because he was too busy glowing with pride for his boyfriend, who was clearly playing even better than Veronica had.
Bretty. 
Brett's half hour finished before he knew it and he watched on as he took an awkward little bow to the scattering of applause from the front row. And then, just as Brett started the short trip back over to him... Eddy swallowed hard. 
Oh fuck. 
Now it would be him, wouldn't it? And there was no way he would measure up to the last two, was there?
Part of him wanted to run, run as fast as he could out of the auditorium and all the way back to Brisbane, so he could curl up there under his bed sheets and be done with the world for good. But of course, instead, he got up mechanically and patted Brett's shoulder before he sat down. 
Patting a dude's shoulder in public was fine. 
"You'll rock!" Brett whispered. 
Yeah. Don't count on it, mate. 

There were people all around, but Eddy might as well have been completely alone as he climbed onto the familiar stage with lead in his shoes and stood in the bend of the piano with Mr. Petti to his left side. 
Remember how much you sucked when you were recording for this? What makes you think you'll be any better today? 
He shook his head softly, trying to dispel the dread. 
"Hi, Eddy." Mr. Petti said pleasantly to his left side, using his indoor voice now, clearly just for his ears. "We have met before as well, I think you played Mendelssohn then?"
Eddy figured that Mr. Petti was probably trying to calm him down, make him feel at ease, but at the same time he was  amazed that Mr. Petti even remembered that. 
"I... I did." he croaked. 
Come on, man! He shouted on the inside. You're here, now. You wanted to be here, didn't you? So come on and fucking well make the most of it. 
He breathed deeply and tried his best to look confident. 
"Okay, let's hear you play!" Mr. Petti boomed, now to the whole room. 
Eddy looked at the pianist, who nodded and started the opening broken D chord. 
Oh, fuck. Fuck!
Oh, he hated this moment of sheer panic, but he was here now... and the sound of the ethereal chords from the piano filled his ears behind him. He closed his eyes, shifted from first to fourth automatically, his vibrato coming online before the bow even touched the strings... and sank into the G. 

"Okay, thank you."
Mr. Petti's voice seemed to come from a huge distance away into the musical lines he was inhabiting and he opened his eyes fully, put his violin down and waited for what his teacher would say. 
"Very good, Eddy. You've come on a long way since we last saw each other! I love your approach to this piece, you clearly have insight to the style period and I think your lines are very good, very lyrical. Now, let's see..."

Time flew as they worked. The nerves were gone, now, because Mr. Petti's input was just as good as it had been for Brett. It was weird, because he seemed to be doing exactly the same, but yet he could hear that his tone was fuller, warmer. And he was glowing all over when Mr. Petti thanked him and turned to the group of students. 
"Okay people, that's lunch! After lunch I would like to hear Dave first."
Eddy blinked into the large, almost empty auditorium. 
He'd done it! He'd done it, and it had... well, it had gone pretty well? He guessed? 
He bowed in the same awkward way Brett had while all his fellow students clapped and smiled at him. He couldn't help but beam back at them. 
Oh, but this was awesome! His heart seemed to reach to the end of the auditorium and back. 
"Thank you, Mr. Petti." he said as he walked past him, back to Brett. 
"Mate! You were great!" Brett enthused when he came back to his seat. The students around them were already getting up and chatting was filling the stale auditorium air. "Let's have lunch and meet some people?"
Eddy nodded and bent forward to put his violin away.