Chapter 37: Would you really have fallen for the second?

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It's now been almost a month since the whole thing with Scottie and Parker went down. I haven't really talked to either of them since then. I've seen Scottie at school, but we've only said a few words to each other in passing.

Parker, on the other hand, I haven't talked to at all. He got out of the hospital a week ago and has been focusing on his physical therapy and recovering, which is also why he hasn't been at school.

But I know Scottie is sending him his homework, so I guess that's a good thing. I've wanted to talk to the both of them, but I couldn't bring myself to.

Scottie said he was going to give me as much time as it took, and I'm grateful for that, but at the same time I want this whole situation to just disappear. I want it to be over as soon as possible, but I know this isn't something you can resolve in just a few days. Obviously I know that won't happen, but a girl can dream.

That's why after my talk with Scottie, I went and talked to my brother, Allen. He helped convince me that I also need to distance myself from the both of them. He said it might help my mind make a decision, or come to some sort of agreement.

*Flashback to 1 month ago*

"So, what should I do?" I asked him.

Allen sat at his desk typing something on his laptop. When he heard Scottie leave, he came in and asked me if I was okay, to which I obviously replied no. I decided to have a talk with him, because every other important decision I've made in my life has stemmed from help from my brother.

It was sort of a shot in the dark, but I'm optimistic.

"Tell me again what happened," he said, continuing to work on his laptop.

"Basically, Scottie came over to talk and he found out everything, from me and Parker. He said he was going to give me time to figure out what I want, which I'm grateful for, but I don't know what to do now. I mean, where do I go from here?"

"Well first off, I think you need to take a moment to just decompress and relax a little. Trying to figure something like this out when you're stressed is never going to work."

My brother was right. Making decisions when you're stressed or under pressure is never a good decision. I took a few deep breaths in and exhaled them slowly, trying to calm my nerves.

It barely helped.

"Can I tell you a story?" my brother asked, finally turning away from his laptop and facing me. I'm happy he did, because I was getting annoyed. Here I am trying to have a very important conversation with my brother and he was only half-listening.

"Sure," I shrugged my shoulders. Anything to distract my mind from Scottie and Parker.

"Do you remember when I called you and told you I had gotten my ex-girlfriend pregnant?" I nodded my head.

"Well, obviously I'm not a father and she's not a mother. We ended up getting an abortion, which you already knew of course. But what I didn't tell you was that it was one of the hardest decisions we've ever had to make, either of us."

"She and I both decided that we were not ready to be parents yet. And, sure, we could've given the kid up for adoption, but with the hundreds of thousands of kids already in the foster system and all the stories I've heard about it, neither one of us wanted our child to go through that."

"Then, we tried to come up with a way to raise the child ourselves, but in the end, we just weren't ready, financially or emotionally. It was a very heartbreaking decision for both of us, but in the end I think it was needed. Sometimes the toughest decisions cause us the most pain, but it doesn't mean they're wrong."

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