Technoblade oneshots

Guns and Withers

PIGS! BIG GIANT PIGS! WOO!

Lots of curse words

Short oneshot!

****

Techno looks at the other pig hybrid beside him. They were looking at each other, silently judging and checking the other out.

Techno is slightly taller than the other, has tusks coming from his mouth, has lots of scars on his face and body from all the fights in skywars and bedwars, and he is also wearing like a royal.

The other has a helmet on their head with their pig ears poking out through it, just a few inches short than Techno, looking like a regular pig hybrid, and also wearing normal clothes. White shirt, albino tiger patterned pants, and a pair of white Converse. Yep.

"What the fuck?"

"What the hell?"

Both spoke.

"Holy shit." Dream and Cartoonz chuckles at the exchange of words before holding on to their best friend's shoulder.

"Oh my god. He's taller than you, Tyler." Terroriser said while eating a cooked steak.

"Why does that even matter, fucker?! You! How old are you?" Wildcat points at Techno.

"21."

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Everyone burst with euphoria and Dream wheezes and let out kettle noises.

Techno eats a golden carrot and watches Wildcat yell at his friends to shut up and stop teasing him with the height and age. Wildcat shouldn't have asked that, Techno could've lied for him but Dream and Sapnap are there. Lesson learned.

"So! Do we guys have a deal?" Dream breaks all the jokes and raises his hand for a handshake. Vanoss grabs his hand and shakes it. "Deal. Alright, boys! Let's prepare for war!"

"You know I could do it by myself." Techno said. Dream shrugs. "Nah. It's more fun with lots of people, y'know?"

"Very well."

****

"TAKE THAT BITCH! HAHAHAH! OH FUCK, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!"

"Die."

The whole squad stood by the walls as Techno and Wildcat destroyed everyone like it was a normal day for them. Dream sits down and summons a bucket of popcorn and enjoys the show with everyone on the walls.

Techno got blown up to the sky with his own withers. Way, way, way up to the heavens. Damn, that's high.

Wildcat looks up to his teammate and shoots a wither to get its attention. "Yo! Your master is fucking falling, stupid bitch!" Techno caught the wither's neck.

Because of the surprise, he dragged the wither down to the ground and it died. "Ahh... That's a shame." Techno gets up and picks up the skull and puts it in his inventory. "Are there still more?"

"Yep! Duck!" Wildcat aims his gun at the Player behind Techno and the piglin ducks down.

Techno teleports behind Wildcat with his enderpearl and stabs the Player that was about to kill Wildcat. "Die."

"Thanks man!"

"No problem."

****

Techno and Wildcat looks at their friends with deadly glares and weapons prepared. The both of them are battered from head to toe. They were pissed that the both of them had to do the job by themselves.

"Well then. Wildcat, what do you think of killing some friends?" Techno asks.

"Oh shit." Dream gets up and pulls Sapnap up. "Let's go. Let's go."

"I won't mind." Wildcat smirks and loads up his gun.

"No headstarts." Techno chases after the other group running for their lives on the left and Wildcat took the guys going on the right.

Boy was the night pleasant.