Technoblade oneshots

#MurderClub

Mentions of Blood

****

While Technoblade is waiting for the water to boil, he listens to the voices in his head.

"Apparently I crave murder so there's gore! MWUAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Oh look someone who craves murdered too, I thought I was the only one."

"Same."

"Same box emoji."

"Hastag murder club."

"Same. Hastag murder club."

"Hashtag murder club."

"Hashtag murder club."

"What the fuck?" Technoblade mumbles and checks if the water is hot enough like lava. Not yet.

"Anyone else drink orphan blood instead of coffee?"

"Nah, but I do mix the blood with the coffee."

"Ya guys don't mix it with orphan tears?"

"I usually mix orphan tears with the blood of rich people, I highly recommend it."

Technoblade blinks and pours the hot water on a mug.

"Sure, the daily drink for youth and strength."

Technoblade let out a loud "heh?!"

"Sounds cool, just I'm too lazy to find orphan so gotta kill someone's parents and hope they're rich."

"Sounds good to me."

"Perhaps on occasion if the orphans have enough time to cry, I gather their tears. It tastes very good."

"Agreed."

Technoblade pours a bit of orphan blood on his coffee and a drop of orphan tears, the coffee let out a puff of air like those fantasy witch when they cook something in their brews. He swirls the spoon on the coffee and taps it to drop the liquid that lingered on the spoon, and puts it on the sink.

"Orphans."