"Sacrifice" II JIHAN II

5:2

Joshua is now fixing all his stuff, but he couldn't get jeonghan out of his head, as much as he wants to stay, he just can't, he can't pick them over his parents who raised him even if they had no money before

Joshua's tear fell from his hands that made him stop packing his stuff, he paused and looked at the tear, while looking at it he just remembered jeonghan who cried really hard back there

He didn't want to hurt them by his leaving, but at least he wants them to know about him leaving, he really wanted to tell all of them but nobody was in their dorm nor he could contact his friends, he didn't have the courage, he thought that if jeonghan cried like that back then, then what will his friends reaction would be like? He got worried at his thought, it made him lose courage to confront them and tell them

"How will I face them...?" 

"Face who, hyung?" 

Joshua was shocked to see Mingyu with Wonwoo

"Since when did you get in here?" Joshua asked while wiping his tears off but not to obvious of course

"We just got here, because I wanted to get my stuffed toy"

"Ah...I see..."

"Btw, hyung, I heard you say, 'How will I face them', Face who hyung?" Mingyu asked

"A-ahh, I-I..." Joshua felt really nervous about this, he wouldn't know what their reaction would be like

"Hyung...Are you hiding something from us?" Wonwoo asked

"And why are you packing you're stuff? Are you going somewhere?" Mingyu asked

"I...am" Joshua felt like he shouldn't hide it anymore because he is leaving tomorro, what's the point in hiding it

"Whe-where are you going hyung...?" Mingyu tried to smile a bit for joshua to not notice that Mingyu was nervous

"I-I'm Le-leaving, Korea..." 

The two boys was shocked and speechless, Some tears started flowing in Mingyu's eyes while wonwoo was like a statue, he froze upon hearing Joshua's words

"H-hyung, You're ki-kidding right...?" Mingyu asked while approaching Joshua

"I'm sorry, Mingyu..." Joshua then started sobbing as well

"Why so sudden? Since when did you plan this? You could've told us before head!" Mingyu was so devastated 

"I didn't plan this, mingyu, it was my mom, her contract is already over here in Korea so she decided on going back to LA tomorrow morning, I also just knew this, this morning, I really planned in telling you guys, but I didn't get the chance, and...I wanted to hangout today with you all but you we're all busy so I hang out by myself but I didn't expect Jeonghan to be there with me"

"So...you already told him?"

"Yes..."

"So that's why hyung was acting strange when he came back to his dorm,  his eyes were red and his shirt was soaked" Wonwoo said

It made Joshua sigh, he remembered how jeonghan cried back at the mall, it was really heart breaking for him. While Joshua was busy with his thoughts, mingyu wanted to make sure if Joshua really didn't have feelings for jeonghan anymore, maybe if there still is, he could still stop Joshua from leaving Korea

"Hyung, Do you like Jeonghan-hyung?"

"Jeonghan? Of course I like him, his really a great perso-"

"No! I didn't mean like a friend, what I meant was, do you like Jeonghan-hyung more than just a friend?"

Joshua didn't really understand, like why was the others had been asking him that, ever since he walked out of the hospital that day, the guys started asking this weird question

"I don't understand...why are you asking me this?" Joshua answered with a confused face

"I-it's Just th-that...yo-you used to...like him, no, not just 'like', but love" 

Joshua didn't react to Mingyu's words, there was no emotion in Joshua's face 

"I see...but you know mingyu, you used the word 'used', which means that, it's already in the past" Joshua just answered without being bothered by it

"S-so, there's really no chance that we'll change you're mind huh..."

"I'm really sorry Mingyu. I don't want to leave you guys but, I really need to, my family needs me, and while their still alive, I'll always take care of them"

"Does the others know?" Wonwoo asked which they forgot that he was still there

"O-only Jeonghan..." Joshua lowered his head and felt the tears flowing out

"What wa-was his reaction...?" Mingyu asked

"I really didn't like it...I regret telling him when he was so happy, I shouldn't have...I only ended on making him cry..."

Joshua was already sobbing while remembering Jeonghan, a part of him wants to stay by his side but there is also a part where he wants to keep his promise to his parents, but the part that wants to stay weights more in Joshua's heart. He remembered how fun they both had a while ago, those memories that Joshua want to really cherish for the rest of his life

"Mingyu...I have something to tell you..." 

"What is it hyung?" Mingyu was also crying right now because of the thought that one of the Hyung's that  he cherish is leaving them

"I...lied to you, Hoshi, DK, and Jeonghan..."

"Wh-what do you mean...?" mingyu asked, confused

"I-"



"Hyung are you alright? ever since you came back here, you've been down, plus you're eyes were red when you entered."

Jeonghan wanted to disappear right now, he didn't knew that his red eyes were that obvious

"Perhaps, Did you cry hyung?" Jihoon asked Jeonghan

Jeonghan regretted picking 'truth', he didn't knew that this question would come

Everyone in the room became silent and looked at jeonghan

"Yeah, you've been acting weird ever since you came back, did something bad happen?" Seungcheol asked

Jeonghan faced reality that he can't really keep it from the guys, plus, Joshua really wanted to tell them but I guess he can't because of what happened at the mall

Jeonghan sighed before speaking

"You got me..." Jeonghan just chuckle at them before looking down

"So, what's the problem hyung?" Hansol asked

"We-well, you see..." Jeonghan can't seem to continue what his saying

"Just spill, it can't be that bad"

"Yeah, we'll help if we could"

"Yeah, just say it"

Jeonghan was getting annoyed at their insistence so jeonghan just bursted out

"Joshua's leaving Korea!" 

The room suddenly became quite, there was not a single noise, it's like the world stopped working

Jeonghan looked at each of them, he couldn't explain their faces. shocked, sad, surprised? He doesn't know which term to use to describe it

"Jo-joshua-hyung...?" Seungkwan asked

"Y-yes..."

"H-hyung...you've got to be kidding. There's no way-"

"I'm sorry but it's true..." 

Their eyes started tearing up, even Jeonghan started tearing up because of his very best friend leaving...he didn't like the thought, but he couldn't help thinking about it, if only he could lock Joshua up so he couldn't leave

"Why...*sobbing*...Why didn't he told us...?"

"He wanted to...he told me that he wanted to hang out with all of you all but you were all busy so he didn't bother on insisting..."

"So...That's why he suddenly told me to call the guys to hang out this morning" 

Everyone looked at Hoshi who suddenly spoke up

"How did you know that hyung? Were you with Joshua hyung before you came back he just a while ago?" The8/Minghao asked

"Yeah, I was with him, I found him in the park sitting by himself so I decided on walking up to him, he even prepared a reservation at the mall for him to tell us about his leaving" Jeonghan answered

Everyone fell silent, they wanted to see Joshua, but they don't know where to find him, but there is this 'what if' questions in their heads, 'what if his not at their dorm? What if he didn't go home tonight? What if he wanted to be alone? What if...'

'Joshuaji...please, change you're mind...please...just stay with me'


T.B.C