"Sacrifice" II JIHAN II

17

"I-I'm what?!!!" I shouted at the top of my lungs.

"Hyung, please calm down. I haven't told Joshua hyung yet but I'll tell him right now-" Chan was about to stand up form his seat but I quickly pulled his arm to made him stop

"No. Don't tell him yet..." I trailed off

"But why-!" Chan asked

"Just don't! Can't you understand that?!!!" I shouted which made Chan flinch at his spot

I'm already in pain as it is. Why does another problem have to show up right now? Can't this problems just leave me alone for once?! How the hell can other people even solve their problems like it's just a wind passing by and you wouldn't even know that it's already gone.

"Hyung, did...something happen between you and Joshua hyung?" Chan asked that made me break out from my thoughts

"H-Huh?" 

"I knew it...." Chan said as he crosses his arms

"What happened this time?" Chan asked

"N-Nothing happened! J-Just leave me alone!" I said then laid back down in a fast pace which made me groan

"Yah! I told you to be careful!" Chan shouted when he heard me groan

Chan wouldn't know but this is giving me so much stress and pressure. It made me burst out crying when Chan finally left the room. I don't want to loose Joshua. I don't want to loose anyone.

I cried and cried until I fell asleep which is the reason why my tears are still visible when I woke up this morning.

Actually, this is the day we fly back to Korea. But because of the happenings this past few days, I don't have the courage to fly back to where my love is at. I know that I'm probably getting ahead of myself but I just can't help but to think that way. It even made me more scared to go back when I heard the news from Chan that I'm...

"Jeonghan hyung, are you alright? Do you need anything else?" Chan asked who was sitting beside me

"N-No, I'm good..." I said then looked outside the window where I can see many clouds and the sun almost setting. It's already getting dark but the blue with the mixture of purple and pink sky is really a mesmerizing view. The same sky that was shown when me and shua first celebrated our anniversary. That day felt so special that I thought that I was floating in the sky, hand in hand with shua while he sings me the song that he composed for me. 

'Han soneneun keopireul deulgo ieopon hanjogeul kkopgo
Sonkkeucheul seuchineun barameul geodneun
Byeolgeo anin chwimireul gachi hal
Shishigolkolhan nal anajul

Geureon sarami
Eodienga itgil baratneunde
Yeogi itne

Mareul geolkka malkka hancham gomindeuri mak
Meorissoge jakku eongkyeo
Gachi mashiryeogo haetteon keopineun beolsseo
Imi du janjae biwo

I'm Falling For U
I'm Falling For U
I'm Falling For U once again
I'm Falling For U
Falling For U
Ppajyeonaogin neujeosseo'

Every word in this song really hits me hard. It made me remember what we used to be when we just started dating. We're always there beside each other every time the world felt like a big chaos. And I'm grateful that he stayed by me whenever I needed him. But why do I feel like we are slowly falling apart? 

"Is this the end of the road for us...?"

"What do you mean hyung?" Chan asked which made me jump a little because of shock

"N-no, don't worry about it. I-I'm just spouting out random stuff" I made up as an excuse

"If you say so" Chan said as he sat back down properly