"Sacrifice" II JIHAN II

7:1

"Please explain more about this disease" Jeonghan requested to the younger one hugging him, Hoshi just nodded in response 

"The disease  is a sickness that only occurs when someone is suffering from unrequited love. The victim will cough up flower petals that symbolize their love. This disease is only cured when the victim's feelings are romantically returned or surgically removed..." Hoshi explained

"W-why didn't shua j-just go through surgery(?)..."  Jeonghan said

Everyone became silent, waiting for Hoshi to speak up

"*chuckles* I just wished that it was that easy hyung, but no, there's a side effect if you undergo surgery" DK finally spoke up

"Do you know about this disease Seokmin?" Seungcheol asked

"Of course I do, I only knew about it when Hoshi hyung told us a few days ago, that was the time when Hoshi hyung was crying in the classroom, he was worried about Joshua-hyung because he kept on vomiting" DK answered honestly which shocked almost half of the boys

"Who else knew about this?" Seungcheol asked

There was a moment of silence before someone spoke up

"Me and Wonwoo knew it too" Mingyu raised his hand while saying it

"I see...then please continue Seokmin, what's the side effect?" Jihoon asked, finally speaking up

"*sigh* If a person with Hanahaki disease wants to undergo surgery, it means that the flowers in his chest will be removed along with that person's feelings for that particular person and their memories with the person they like...and unfortunately, Joshua-hyung also took the surgery..." DK said, almost on the verge of crying

"S-So that's why y-you took me to the hospital that d-day" Jeonghan really regretted not knowing anything that was happening to his bestfriend

Hoshi noticed how Jeonghan was looking really regretful, and even if he doesn't say it, it was all written in his face, the face that tells that he was lacking as Joshua's bestfriend all this time

"Don't blame yourself hyung, it wasn't your fault and it wasn't anyone else's fault too, so remove that  expression from your face, it doesn't look good on you, you look like a horse like Seokmin" 

"Hey! I do not look like a Horse" Seokmin complained

Everyone laughed a little at his lame joke but at least, he made Jeonghan laugh and to lessen the gloomy atmosphere inside the room

The atmosphere became comfortable after a while of silence. Until Mingyu spoke

"Guys...I have something to tell you..." Mingyu said which made everyone in the room look at him with a questioning face

"What is it?" Seungkwan asked

"I-... uh-... actually-.... I-..." Mingyu couldn't continue because of nervousness, his voice was also cracking

"Spill!" Hansol shouted

"Joshua-hyung didn't took the surgery!" Mingyu shouted in pressure

Everyone stared at him with a confused face especially the 3 boys who was Joshua's actions that day after he left the hospital

"Mingyu what are you talking about? We clearly saw Joshua-hyung come out of the hospital that day, plus, his words was so cold as ice-" Hoshi's words were cut by mingyu

"He faked it...he faked everything ever since that day..."

Everyone's expression was blank and you can't see if they were happy, sad, or I don't know

"So...all this time, he still had the disease?" DK asked

"Yes, actually." Mingyu responded

"But how did you know gyu?" Seungkwan asked

"He told me last night, remember when I told you that I would be getting something from our dorm? I saw Joshua hyung there, packing his stuff while crying, then he started explaining  what really happened and Wonwoo was also there with me that time"

Every one was busy asking questions to mingyu and didn't notice Jeonghan ran to his room, he felt like Joshua really didn't want to stay with him anymore, he felt like he really did make a mistake, big time. Many questions were running through his head, 'Why did he keep it from us?' 'Did I really gave him that much pain for him to distance himself from me?' 'Why...?'

Tears started dripping from his eyes, his heart was aching, head was hurting, and he felt lonely, at times like this, there was only one person that was always beside him, and that was none other than his bestfriend, his bestfriend that he let go of, his bestfriend that he didn't see, he was the only person to truly care about Jeonghan, No matter how they're other friends take care of him, he still wants Joshua's care, Jeonghan wanted all of his care, attention, and love just to himself. He didn't want to share or to give anyone else the kind of love only Joshua can give, for him Joshua was already enough, but he didn't expect that he was already hurting him so much...

"I miss you...shua *sobs*" 
"Please come back..."
"I'll do anything..."
"Just come back...*sobs*"

Jeonghan started letting out this words again and again, hoping that someone might hear him, hoping that he might hear it...

Jeonghan saw the window and saw some rain drops on it, but it only reminded him of Joshua.
He remembered how they used to cry when it's raining, they always let out their frustration while crying in the rain because they both felt like the rain was crying with them

"I'm glad it's raining today shua, because I won't be crying alone..." jeonghan whispered to himself




"I'm glad that I won't be crying alone..." Joshua said while looking at the rain outside the window of the taxi, on the way to the airport to meet his mom and to leave Korea...


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jeonghan cried until night time, he wouldn't stop even if someone was already knocking at his door, but he instantly looked at the door opening and revealing two figures, it was Mingyu and Jihoon, they wore a worried expression when they saw Jeonghan's tears started falling when they entered

"Hyung..." Jihoon started

"You know what jihoon...I really envied you before"