My Mojo. [Completed]

Chapter [ 5 ]

[ Flow and Mojo❤ (in the media) ]

Mojo

I'm done with my family. I seriously don't want anything to do with them. Nothing. This was my last time trying to "work it out" with them. They fucked up forreal this time. Once we leave, it's over. I'm not looking back.

My poor baby. I hated blowing up like that when she was around but they touched me somewhere deep. Somewhere I didn't want to go anymore.

I've tried to change for my mother. I tried it out with a guy but it was no good. I wasn't feeling it from the jump. I'm done pretending. I've been done for awhile now. If they can't accept me then so be it.

"Baby, everything is packed." Flow came and say by me on the floor of the bathroom. I laid my head in her lap and she played with my dreads.

Everything was quiet. I didn't hear anything except us breathing. Flow spoke softly,

"Mo.."

"Hmm?" I sniffed.

"Why..Why didn't you tell me about your... your cousin?" she asked.

I sighed heavily and closed my eyes. I didn't really want to talk about my past but I knew I needed to talk about it sooner or later. I still have dreans about it.

"..She said it was just a game." I felt my lips tremble and I sniffed.

The warm salty liquid flowed from my eyes and down my face as I thought about how manipulative my cousin was.

"I was so young..I didn't have any idea. I-I-I ..ya know.. I just thought she was being nice..at first." Flow rubbed my back softly.

"We would um.. we would play doll house. I'd be the daughter. She'd be mommy." I sat up and faced Flow. Her face saddened.

"...God, she'd make me dress up in these.. these ugly stupid dresses.." I laughed sarcastically rolling my eyes.

"Whenever it was time for me to take a bath, she'd undress me and just feel on me. It hurt.. What she did h-h-hurt.." My voice became hoarse as I spoke more loudly.

Flow put her head down and shook her head.

".. She'd undress and make me touch her. I didn't know what it meant. Part of me wanted to, part of me felt strange. She'd make these noises when I touched her below.." I licked my lips.

I felt so sick to my stomach.

"When I turned 11, she told me she had a surprise for me. She took me out to eat, got me my favorite movie and got a room. My mom... she was always so busy. I was always with Yonna." I started crying again.

A part of me blames my mom. If she was around more, maybe I wouldn't have ended up like thi. Maybe I wouldn't be this big disappointment. But everything happens for a reason. Maybe it was meant to happen. All the pain that I've buried inside was now coming back up.

"..and um. That night, she forced herself inside of me with a big ass dildo. Continuously. She wouldn't stop..she wouldn't s-stoop.." I cried out.

I could no longer speak. My vision was blurry and I felt light headed. Flow grabbed me tightly into her lap.

"I'm so sorry baby. I'm so sorry. Shh shhh.. you have me now. I won't let anything happen to you. I won't let anyone hurt you anymore." she said into my ear.

I felt safe with her. I held onto her and cried my eyes out. It felt good to have told somebody but it still hurt. My own damn cousin violated me and fucked my mind up. I forgave her so long ago but my mom. I haven't forgiven her yet.

"Did you ever try to tell your mom?"Flow asked once I stopped crying uncontrollably.

"Uh.. yeah. And she didn't believe me. Just like she didn't when I said it earlier."

That's right. When I was 16 years old, I got fed up with it and told my mom. This sick ass neglect went on for about eight years and not once did anyone ever ask me if I was ok. If I needed anything. If I was happy. My mom knew I liked girls when I was 13. From then, she became someone I didn't know. This monster. This insensitive mess of a "mother." When I told her about Yonna, she laughed and said that I was crazy. I knew then that I no longer had the love and support that I needed. Not even from my own mother.

That's when I turned my back against them all. I should've kept it turned. I should've kept them in my past along with those memories.