Meant to Be

Chapter 41

Jackson Pov:

We entered the storeroom and immediately felt the discomfort that accompanied us during this meeting. We were probably not sure if we really wanted to talk about what happened. It does not bother me somehow, because I still hope that I will finally find out why she left then and what stood in our way.

- "You have four minutes left,"- she informed me, looking for something in the cupboards in the storeroom.

- "Why are you avoiding me?" - I asked after another moment of silence.

- "What? I'm not avoiding you," - she said, pretending to be surprised that I asked the question - "We just didn't get a chance to talk. You hang out with April and I spend most of my time at work. I just got back too, and you know. A lot is happening."

- "Lexie, you know that's not the point,"- I said. - "You know we need to explain it, and I'd like to know why you left so suddenly. Was it bad or something?"

- "On the contrary, it was very good and I told you this several times,"- she said - "But do we have to talk about it now? You know you're with April and that's a little weird."

- "What's that weird about? Just tell me why?"

- "What why? What do you want to know?" - she asked

- "Why did you leave then?" - I asked, already raising my voice.

- "Because I hurted someone with that! Because I shouldn't be doing it by being friends with that person! And now I'm back and everything is even more unclear! I messed up in LA too being drunk!" - she said louder

- "Who have you hurt?! - I asked, irritated that I am not getting clear information and I have to play with guesses.

- "April!" - she shouted, and I was speechless.

I didn't get it a bit, but now that Lexie said the puzzle was starting to piece together. Probably April told Lexie that she had feelings for me, and Grey felt bad that she slept with me knowing about her friend's feelings. It's a bit complicated, as probably everything in female friendships. And what am I now standing between two women. Uhh, I guess it'll be better if April doesn't find out.

- "Okay now I don't know what to say" - I said lost - "Maybe you could explain it to me somehow?"

- "There is nothing to explain here! I broke up as a friend and I can't admit it to April and to myself! Even if it was just sex, but it wasn't sex like with some ordinary random guy! Believe me! I felt special! And that makes it even worse!"

- "For me it was not something ordinary, but when you left .." - I started to explain - "When you left the on-call room you left it as if it was known. It's over and that's it, so you can't blame me for starting date April. That I didn't wait for you."

- "I'm not. I couldn't be angry" - she confessed and gave me an apologetic look - "I'm happy that you are both happy. You don't even know how much April tried to tell you her feelings. I am so proud of her that she finally summoned up her courage. On the other hand, I am so ashamed. That it was so easy for me to do something she had dreamed of for years."

We stood there for a while and I saw that it was biting her. That she's not comfortable with it. I wanted to help her somehow, but I didn't know how, because it wasn't easy for me either.

- "Do you regret we did it?" - I asked after a while and saw that she was surprised by my question.

- "No, I do not regret it and I will never regret it because it was a beautiful night" - she said - "But I can't forgive myself for lying to April now, because moments before my departure I slept with a boy she liked for years. And I can't look her in the face and speak about it now."