Meant to Be

Chapter 47

Lexie Pov:

Relief, this is how I could describe the feeling that was with me now. After all, everyone knew Mark and I were no longer together. Despite the fact that I did not keep my promise to Mark, I believe that for all the lies he invented, he deserved such a solution. It's so surprising how from so much love we turn into gradual hatred and contempt. But no matter what about our breakup, it has officially become in the eyes of all the people important to us that we are after the breakup. Thanks to that I am partially able to start my life anew. New me, new life, new goals and plans for the future, maybe even a new love in some time? Sitting in the women's staff bathroom, the vision of the future on the one hand was now simpler, even more so in the present situation. The simpler one was the one I dreamed about, planned years ago, at the end of high school during the childhood of a young girl. Now that reality caught me a little faster than I thought and planned, going back to my plans is much easier than arranging updated cells.

I clearly remember myself just after writing my last high school exams. When, thanks to prior planning and completing all matters related to the end of school, I could rest with my boyfriend at the time (it was a bit of a nerd, but he was sweet ok?) in our favorite park. And like all high school couples, we dreamed about the future. Well, as we can all suppose, only one thing came true - I became a doctor ...

In the current situation, this fact of becoming a doctor is also quite ridiculous. I should know what to do now, because I have advised a younger woman or my age more than once what to do in such a situation. But I think as a specialist I approach everything with a professional distance. In the beginning everything influenced me, now it has moved to a slightly different dimension. The patient is discharged and my help for him is running out, I cannot do more. However, unless you are faced with such a situation, you yourself finally understand what your patients are really going through. What dilemmas are they associated with? I don't know what to do at this point. I'm stuck and I don't see a way out, I mean, I know a few, but none of them appeals to me, none of them is what I would like to do.

And then I was disturbed by a strong pull on the door. I was about to tell a lost patient that this was a staff bathroom and to ask him out politely. However, to my surprise, it was not a scared patient, but Arizona.

- “Oh, gosh, I'm sorry! Every time I can't open that door without slamming for the whole hospital” - she began to explain, a soft smile appeared on my face, caused by her innocence and clumsiness.

- “Don't worry, I can't open them either, it would be nice to say it to the janitor hah” - I replied

- “Hey, I went in and I think I broke you a little with some thoughts, are you okay?” - she asked, which didn't surprise me, I was sitting curled up in a ball on the toilet floor, firmly holding an object in my hand, which when she drew my attention, I hid between my legs.

- “Yes, I’m really good, surprisingly. I thought it would be worse after this self-pleading dinner, but I must have learned to work on my emotions lately and I have worked through my anger” - I explained, then noticed that the doctor started to sit next to me in the same way.

- “Oh yeah, this dinner tonight. I want to say right away that I was against this idea!” - she began to explain - “I told him right away that it would end badly!”

- “Relax, I agreed to it” - I admitted half my guilt - “I can control my emotions already, but I still have to learn to say no to Mark. My love for him does not help me in this, but I have to think about myself, not only for his good.”

- “And how did it end with a massacre?”

- “In general, everything would have happened perfectly if it had not been for Addison, who unexpectedly disturbed her presence and whispered all the lies of Mark from the last month, and since I hate lies, it was beyond my limit and Mrs. Shepherd found out the truth from my lips” - I explained without losing the details .