Not Everything Is What It Seems (Book I)

When love speaks louder, forgiveness can't be too far

“T-twins?” I heard Brian ask Diana, the doctor. She let out a small chuckle, before nodding her head.

“I believe so.”

“Oh god..” Brian stepped back as he started feeling dizzy with the news. I’m sure it would’ve happened me the same if I wasn’t lied down in a gurney. My hands were shaking, I couldn’t feel my legs and it was getting hard to breathe as I put more thought in the situation I was in.

“Are you okay, sir?” The doctor asked concerned. I looked up at Brian and saw him with a hand on his face while the other was holding his weight on the wall to prevent him from falling.

“Actually, I’m not feeling very well.”

“Please, sit here.” She offered him her own chair. “Tracey will bring you a cup of water with sugar.” Tracey was a young nurse that was also there in the room to help the doctor with whatever she needed. The girl left the room and Brian sat down next to me on the chair. I placed my hand on his knee, but he didn’t lift his gaze for me. “And you, Annie? You okay?” I turned to Diana, not sure of what to say. My head was a mess and I felt like my body was being ravaged by a strong wave of emotions that I couldn’t control or understand. However, I opted for the easier answer.

“Yeah, I just wasn’t expecting this news.” I wasn’t lying, but I wasn’t being completely honest too. The nurse returned with the water and Brian gladly drank it, although he didn’t seem to feel any better.

“I think we’re ready to hear the heartbeats of the babies, uh?” Oh god, now I’m really going to collapse. How can she stay so calm when I’m about to explode? I glanced up at Brian, hoping to find some comfort or anything to make me calm down, but he was distant and that was like a stab in my heart. When I needed him the most he gets all weird with me.

All of a sudden, the doctor clicked on a button and the sound of a fast heartbeat invaded my ears, snapping me out of my thoughts. My eyes immediately shot to the screen. It was like the whole world had stopped and the only thing happening was that heartbeat. A heartbeat that I knew it was coming from inside of me. It was coming from a little life I was carrying on my womb and that depended on me to survive. A life that was a result from the love between two persons. A love between me and Brian. I felt my eyes welling up with tears and I couldn’t help but chuckle.

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” The doctor said, smiling at me.

“It’s amazing. I can’t even.. oh my god.”

“Now, let’s hear the other one.” She swift something on the screen and another heartbeat started. It was slightly different, but not much. “Look at these strong heartbeats. You’ve got some tough babies over here.” She chuckled.

“I can’t believe in this. I never thought that this could be so… touching.”

“I know. Mommies always get more emotional when they hear their baby’s heartbeat. In this case they’re two.” I smiled at her and felt my motherly side pop up. I still hadn’t felt this, but now I knew I was ready and I was sure that I really wanted this. Once again, my eyes searched for some sign of Brian’s happiness, but they found nothing. He was staring blankly at the screen. No smile on his face. No light in his eyes. No nothing. Only a cold and somewhat disappointed look on his face. I couldn’t help but feel my smile being vanished away.

After taking note of some other aspects of the babies, the doctor cleaned my stomach from the oil and I stood up from the gurney. We talked a little bit more and I scheduled my next appointment, before leaving the room with Brian. When we were heading out of the clinic he didn’t say a word. He was so strangely quiet that it was scary.