It's Way Too High

Our Song

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Honestly, I'm feeling pretty shit today 
and sharing sth that I love always help me
so here you go, I guess 

[p.s: Hope everyone's okay or much better than I am]

Love you all x

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I got no rest.

But I did get a panic attack.

And to make matter worse, the kids were there to see me losing my mind.

I have no idea what happens or how did it happen, but two hours or so into the surgery, the kids and the engaged couple rushed towards me, the two of them flashing me a big apologetic smile while the kids bombardier me with thousand of questions.

I tried my best to answer the question that was mostly asked by the twins because they're just way too young to understand the circumstance, but also Keegan's calmer and more composed question. I knew he was worried, probably as worried as I was. The kid was extremely smart and at times like this, I wish he wasn't. I don't want him to carry the weight too.

Halfway answering their never-ending question, the surgery room's flag suddenly turned to blue and then it was like a blur; a huge, blurry mess. The nurses rushing in and out of the room, shouting to each other for more equipment and hands as the words "move, move" kept being said again and again.

"We're losing him" One of them yelled out, out of the blue.

I felt myself stop breathing as everything around me crumbling down along with my body and sanity. I could hear Michael and Calum calling out my names asking for a response, but I was too deep in my thought and sorrow to answer them.

I could feel someone pulling me into their embrace, rubbing my arm reassuringly as they instruct me to follow their breathing. I eventually did once I come back to my sense, shakily following whoever it is and did as they said.

"Ash, Ash, are you with me now, bud?"

"P- please..."

"Alright, bub, I want you to tell me 5 things that you can see, can you do that, bub?"

"C- chairs... d-door, walls, people, I- I can't," I felt my breathing going rigid again, before whoever it is pulled me onto their lap.

"It's alright, bub. Take your time, one more thing, babe. I know you can do it,"

"C-hairs, door, w-walls, people, a-and lights."

"Good job, now bub, name 4 things that you can touch."

"Y- your arms, the-the floor, my shoes, y- your shoes,"

"Well done, spill the 3 things you can hear, please"

"C-crying, a music, a-and beeping sounds,"

"Beeping sounds?" He made sure and I nodded my head before realisation came to me. 

Beeping sounds. That was Luke's heart monitor! That means he's back to life!