Chapter 12

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Hindi makatingin si Sarah sa mga fans nila ni Gerald na halatang nasaktan that night . Matapos ang usual na pakikisalamuha sa mga fans ay tuloy tuloy na si Sarah sa dressing room. Nakakaramdam ito ng hiya sa sarili kahit na wala namang sinasabi ang mga kasamahan at staff ng show sa kanya na dapat niyang ikahiya. Mukha ngang all out support pa ang mga ito sa kanya.

Hindi din niya maipaliwanag bakit siya nagkaganoon. Wala itong kibong nagbihis at nag alis ng make up. Wala ding sinabi ang mga parents niya at lalong walang sinabi ang mga taga Viva. Nakatingin lang ito sa kanya.

Sinabi ng isa sa mga staff na na nasa labas ng dressing room niya si Sam. Mukhang hinihintay siya. Lumabas ng dressing room si Sarah at kinausap si Sam.

" Hey , how you feeling?" Tanong ni Sam sa kanya.

"Awful!" Sagot ni Sarah.

"I am just wondering if you want to go out for dinner? Unwind maybe?"

"I think I better go home and prepare myself for badnews tomorrow. I am sure there will be lots of bad news about me tomorrow. " Nakayukong sabi ng dalaga.

"Your fans love you Sars. I don't think they even noticed your relapsed toniight . If there will be, therell be just few who will say bad things about you."

"Thank you for always lifting my spirit. Salamat talaga."

"Di ba sabi ko naman saiyo, this time whether you like it or not , whether you need me or not, I will be around."

"Sana hindi ka magsawa." Makahulugang sabi ng dalaga.

"Ok then, how about tomorrow night? I know you don't usually work on Mondays. Hoping we can do something special tomorrow?" Nagbabakasakali pa ring hirit ni Sam.

"What you thinking?" Nangingiting tanong ni Sarah.

"Are you upto a bike ride?"

"Tempting!:" napangiti na si Sarah pagka banggit ng bike ride.

"You'll like that?" Nabuhayan ng loob si Sam ng makita and excitment sa mukha ni Sarah .

"I'd love to. Where we going?"

"If we start early we can go picnic/swimming in Tanay, Rizal. Have you heard of Daranak and Batlag Falls?"

"I've been in Tanay but was not able to see those falls. Ok , let's do it."

Hindi makapaniwala si Sam sa narinig. "Are you sure? Don't you have to ask your mom and dad first?"

"No, its my day off and want to do something special. At least tomorrow, I will be away from gossips and intrigues even for just a day."

"Alright, I better get going then so I ca prepare our picnic and rent a more comfortable motorcycle for us to use. I want you to enjoy this outing."

"Alright, anong oras mo ko susunduin?"

"As early as possible. How early can you be ready?"

Hindi maka decide si Sarah. " I can be ready at 7 am if need be."

"You sure? Perfect then will be at your house at 7." 

***** 

Bago mag showeray binuksan ni Sarah ang laptop niya. Nag check siya ng email at sa dami ng unopened mails niya ay mga galing kay Gerald ang una niyang binasa.

Isa isa niya itong binasa. Hindi na naman niya napigilan ang umiyak. "I love you so much too but why do we have to end it like this?"

Bago pa siya tuluyang mag break down na naman sa kaiiyak ay tumayo na ito at nag shower. Duon siya nag iiyak ng todo.

Paglabas niya ng banyo, nag bihis ng pantulog. Humarap uli sa laptop at nag compose ng email para kay Gerald.

"I am sorry, it was very childish of me behaving like that tonight in my own show. Nakalimutan ko hindi na nga pala tayo, matagal na.

Salamat, hindi nyo na ako binanggit sa interview mo sa The Buzz. Malaking bagay yun para sa akin kahit na nagulat ako at nagtaka. Anuman ang dahilan , salamat uli.

Oo nasaktan ako sa pag amin mo tungkol sainyo ni Maja. Actually hindi naman talaga kataka taka na magustuhan mo siya. She is very nice, outgoing ,fun to be with at halos pareho kayo when it comes sa mga hilig. Alam ko mahilig siya sa mga out of town trips with friends din.

Good luck at sana nga in time pareho nating mas maintindihan why a love so true has to end like it did to ours Sa ngayon masakit pa rin at sana nga huling beses ko ng pagkawala sa sarili ang nangyari kanina.

Gaya ng pangako natin sa isat isa nuon pa man, we will always be each other number one fan. Deep in my heart I know you will not hurt me on purpose.

Like you, you will always have a special place in my heart and if somewhere down the road, our paths will cross again, who knows by then we are ready to say this time love is all that matters. For now, we both know, it's not.

Take care of yourself always Babe!"

Huminga ng malalim si Sarah then click send.  

*****

"Yes BabyGirl, I will always be your number one fan. I will take care of myself for you. I am not going to say good bye. 

To quote a song :

Well someday love is gonna lead you back to me  

But 'til it does I'll have an empty heart  

So I'll just have to believe  

Somewhere out there you thinking of me

Until the day I'll let you go  

Until we say our next hello  

It's not goodbye  

'Til I see you again  

I'll be right here rememberin' when  

And if time is on our side  

There will be no tears to cry  

On down the road  

There is one thing I can't deny  

It's not goodbye

"It's not goodbye BabyGirl! Love you always and forever."

Hindi na sinagot ni Sarah ang reply ni Gerald sa email niya. Nasabi na lang niya sa sarili , for now it is good bye Babe.

***** 

Paano pala Samuel pag nalaman ni Sarah yung nasabi mo ng gusto mong ligawan si Shaina?" Tanong ni KC sa kabilang linya.

"That is something that has been in my mind since I told her my feelings."

"Wrong timing ka naman no? Kala ko pa naman smooth sailing na. Kung ako saiyo, sasabihin ko na sa kanya na sinabi mo yun at aminin mo na rin ang tutuong attracted ka din kay Shaina ."

"What would she thinks of me if I tell her that. She might think I am just like the other guys, can't make up my mind whom I like."

"Why did you start going out with Shaina in the first place when we both know you love Sarah?"

"I did not know that they are having problems. I am trying to move on too. I thought its just about time to start going out again and mingle and Shaina happens to be single too and we get along fine."

KC sighed deeply. "So just tell her tomorrow, baka mamaya pati friendship mawala kung hindi ka magiging honest sa kanya right away."

"I will." Pangako ni Sam sa kaibigan.

"Ok, have fun tomorrow, and be safe." Paalala ni KC bago matapos ang pag uusap nila.

Kailangan ngang sabihin niya kay Sarah ang tungkol kay Shaina. Hindi pa siya talaga formal na nanliligaw sa dalaga pero nakapaglabas na siya ng statement sa press na yun nga lumalabas sila and they are in the stage of knowing each other. Inamin din niya na balak niyang ligawan ang dalaga to the point na gusto din niyang magpaalam sa isa sa bestfriends niyang si John Pratts na dati namang boyfriend ni Shaina. Ayaw din niyang maging laman ng mga tabloids ang tungkol sa kanila. Ayaw niyang malagay sa alanganin dalawang babaeng malapit sa kanya. 

*****

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