Live A Little

Chapter 59

AN: it is the hardest fucking thing trying to find pictures with Miles. 

Finally it was the day I could go home. I was sick and tired of sleeping in an uncomfortable bed. I was carrying Shawn while Ryder pushed me in the wheel chair. I still felt sore from giving birth and after the surgery down there... that baby ripped me. 

The baby squeaked in my arms and I giggled looking up at Ryder. He smiled down at Shawn in awe and led us into the elevator. The elevator dinged and we exited out of the hospital with the nurse right next to us. 

She helped me up while Ryder placed the baby gently in the car seat and I slid in the back seat with him. Ryder scooted in on the other side with my parents in the front seat. Mom looked back at me and raised her phone in the air. 

"Smile." She sang. I rolled my eyes shaking my head. "Oh come on sweetie I need to post this on my Instagram!" "And what the hell would you caption it?" "Swearing." My father warned. I rolled my eyes looking over at my mom. "My caption would be my baby taking her baby home for the first time." I rolled my eyes and smiled. 

"Would I be in it?" Ryder questioned. "Of course sweetie!" My mom cooed. Ryder smiled stupidly grabbing onto my hand. With my other I held Shawn's little foot while he sacked out alseep. "He's so cute." I mummbled. "He gets it from you." Ryder stated. 

I chuckled, "Not even he looks like you." "I beg to differ, babe." "Both of you are cute that's where he gets it from." My stated ending our little arguemnt. My dad drove slowly through the neighborhood and I waved at my younger brother and got out of the car. 

Paul came out with balloons and a boquet of flowers and handed them to me. He also gave me a card for Shawn with the words, you beat abortion on it. I rolled my eyes hugging him while he chuckled and I walked inside setting my baby bag down in the livingroom. 

Ryder follwed behind me halling the baby with him and gently lifted him out of his seat and handed him over to me. he started whimpering while I hushed him letting him lay in my arms when I bounced him lightly.

"He may be hungry." My mom stated. I turned away lifting my shirt off of me with one arm leaving my undershirt on and slipped my breast out and Shawn latched onto my nipple immedietly. Ryder turned me around and I smacked his hand away keeping away from my dad seeing my chest along with my brother. 

He stepped in front of me and looked down, "Oh right." He mumbled blushing snf turned away. I scoweled and looked down at Shawn. He sat there with his eyes closed lightly eating and I remembered I needed to burp him after he has eaten because I do not want baby vomit on me just yet. 

I grabbed a blanket off of  the couch and set it on top of Shawn and I. I slowly sat my bottom down and slipped off my sandals already exhausted. Ryder sat next to me and smiled down at me. "So far so good?" He questioned. I yawned nodding. "I'm just tired and it's annoying because I have literallt done nothing."

"That's what it's like for the first few months. Then you get used to it." My mom said sitting opposite of us and brought out yarn and knitting tools. "Knitting really?" I queationed. She shrugged, "Don't knock it till you try it." I laughed out loud but stopped once the baby started crying. 

I sighed handing him over to Ryder letting him take care of it. My mom watched us as we both stood up making little shushing noises while Ryder lightly bounced him trying to get him to stop crying for awhile. 

"Make sure you burp him as well." I reminded. He nodded his head and smiled down at me and rolled his eye. "Babe don't worry, I got it under control." "Well I'm just making sure." I said. I hissed grabbing the baby and gave Ryder a dirty look. "Make sure you keep your arm under neath his head and neck." He sighed sitting down on the couch. 

"Give me credit that I got him to stop crying. I'd rather have him just cry than have a broken neck along with crying." He got up and walked away from me while I looked down at my mom. 

"Try to be a little more nicer, will you?" She spat getting up and went to check up on Ryder. I inwardly groaned sitting down on the couch while my father walked up sitting right next to me. He grabbed the sleepy baby setting him on his chest and looked over at me. 

"You know she's right." He said. "I know.." I mummbled. "You've got to give the boy props, I mean he could have left you to be taking care of the baby on your own." I nodded my head sadly realizing how rude I have been to him lately. 

"It's just hard, I don't want Shawn Brady to get hurt." "And I'm sure Ryder doesn't either but you have to give him some support. I mean he is an eighteen year old who, correct me if I'm wrong, doesn't know much about newborns." I looked up at him feeling a lot of regret. 

"Have a little more compassion Alex." 

My mom and dad took over taking care of Shawn Brady for awhile while I went upstairs to resolve the conflict that was going on between Ryder and I. 

"Hey." I mummbled knocking on my bedroom door. Ryder looked up at me with red rimmed eyes. The guilt hit me hard. "You know I'm trying so hard." He mummbled with sadness. "I know, baby." I asnwered sitting next toon the bed.

"I was going to start to going to parenting classes with Glen this month for dad's but then it was too late because he already came into the world and now I just feel like a bad parent." He muttered trying to hold back tears. 

"Hey you're not a bad parent." I assured. "It seems like it. With how many times you yell at me within ten minutes." I sighed, "Ryder I don't mean any of it. I'm just stressed because I don't want the baby to get hurt." 

"This is what I mean, it's like you're accussing me of trying to hurt the little guy." I looked away unsure of what to say, "It's just... My over protective instincts are kicking in way too strong. But Ryder I can assure you that you are no worse of a parent than I." 

He nodded his head wiping his eyes. "I just don't want to hurt him and you scare me when you catch my flaws before me." I closed my eyes smiling, "You know I only point them out so you can learn so when I do need breaks you won't have to have me tell you what to do." He nodded his in reposne smiling up at me. 

"Promise me you'll stop being so mean and hostile?" "I promise I'll stop being mean but I can't on the hostile part." Ryder sighed, "Fair enough." "Good now kiss me."