I Know Your Scared Of The Unknown

Chapter 58

*6 months later*

I didn't think that it was going to take me so long to get over him. The day that I left him standing in the garden at the hotel after seeing the video of him fucking that girl Sammi at a concert, I was almost positive that I would be able to forget about him in a week and start to carry on with my life like normal, like I was never married to Post Malone. But, I think that was what the problem was. I was never married to Posty I was married to Austin Richard Post and I knew deep down that he wouldn't do that to me, he just let a Posty moment take control and there was no doubt in my mind he regretted every moment of it when he came out of it.  It didn't change the fact that what he did was wrong, but I just knew Austin wouldn't hurt me like that.

The  moment that I walked away from him that day and got into the black Denali that would ultimately whisk me away from him I immediately knew that I made the biggest mistake of my life. But the decision was made and there was no turning back, at least not with the team of experts. If we wanted to be back together we'd have to do it on our own...if our paths ever crossed again that is.

I sulked in my house for months on end, if it wasn't for Lauren there would've been almost no way I could've made it through. I fought daily with the demons that took up what I had thought to be permanent residency in my mind, each one of them tickling my fancy with the idea of calling him, texting him or even worse going back to the home that we were supposed to share after everything was said and done on decision day. But, I knew no matter how much I wanted to do all of those things I couldn't just run back to him with open arms. His mistake with Sammi still happened regardless how he may have felt about it afterwards and because of that he still needed time to realize what he had done. The words I had said to him that day replayed in my head like a record that wouldn't skip to the next song.

I hope our paths meet again Austin and if they do I'll take that as a sign that we were truly meant to be and that maybe trying our relationship again would be worth another shot. But until fate comes into play I have to say goodbye.

No matter what the annoying little green monsters were trying to convince me to do, I had to put our future in fates hands even if that meant sitting at home in the same pair of sweats and tank for weeks, I wasn't trying to impress anyone anyway the only guy I wanted was him and even if fate didn't bring us back together that was never going to change.

Of course I got better as the months passed, like anyone would following a breakup, things just kinda move on around you and you either decide to go with the flow or get stuck in the current drowning perpetually in the waves of your sorrow. Just because I had decided to swim didn't mean that I didn't want to be with him, he was still all I thought about morning, noon and night. Not one thing transpired throughout the day that didn't make me think of him. It was like despite everything our souls were connected and there was nothing that was going to sever that unbreakable bond.

***

I let out a sigh standing in front of my full length mirror. Lauren had called me earlier expressing her disdain at me still being confined to the four walls of my house on the day that should've marked six months since Austin and I decided to stay with each other. There was nothing more that I wanted than to sit in my joggers in one of Austin's tees—that somehow managed to make their way into my things—and watch sappy Hallmark movies all day as I prayed to the Gods of fate to please bring me back together with my one and only love.

But, Lauren had other plans.

She had somehow convinced me that if I didn't leave the couch that no matter how much I put everything into fates hands nothing was going to happen again between Austin and I. It wasn't like he was just going to show up on my doorstep. So, in an attempt to make her point crystal clear to me she convinced me to go on a let's test fate night at Ibiza. I hadn't been there since my senior year in college and really had no interest in going back but she insisted that it would be the perfect place to drown my thoughts, so I agreed even if it was mostly to get her off of my back.