Royal Society Series #4
Being a woman in this time is a great disadvantage when you are a Royalty and Blaire is the living proof of it. She was born and raised inside the Palace, trained and nurtured to become the future leader of their clan.
She to...
Having a sibling doesn't bother me then. In my case, I don't mind having another one. I am fine being the only child but having a sibling doesn't matter to me.
Not until my parents can barely look after Aivie. Masyado silang naging abala sa mga gawain para tignan ang kapatid ko kaya inaasa na lang ito sa mga tao dito. I've seen it first hand kaya noong dumating ang oras na iyon ay hindi ko na masyado inisip ang desisyon ko.
I took care of Aivie like my own. In between my breaks, I would look after her and play with her. Hanggang sa nakasanayan ko na unahin ang kapakanan niya palagi bago ako. That's when I gave myself this kind of responsibility.
I became somewhat Aivie's mother. Putting her on my number one priority list, defending her from her mistakes, and giving all the love and needs that I think she needs. I never thought of it as a burden because she is my sister and in my mind, it is my responsibility to take care of her.
But I didn't know that in my own little way of being her sister... I'm losing myself along the way.
Kuya Vince's words rang in my mind after he left me alone. I smiled sadly because I don't know anymore how to choose myself... how to take care of myself. It was always someone else before myself kaya... nakalimutan ko na ang sarili ko.
Is loving my sibling reasonable enough to lose myself in the process?
"I just gave myself a difficult question to answer," mahina akong natawa sa pagkausap ko sa sarili.
Tumayo na ako mula sa pagkakaupo ko sa couch nang mapahinto ako dahil kay Sean. He was leaning on the wall with both of his hands in his pocket while staring at me. Nang nakita niya akong tumayo ay umayos siya ng tayo at nakapamulasang humarap sa akin.
"Told myself that I would just fetch you but you seem in pretty deep thoughts," Sean said.
Napahinto ako sa paglakad at hindi nakasagot sa kaniya. How could I have the guts to tell him that he is actually the turning point of my problems? The clan's financial problems worsened because of him. The vile feelings my sister has for him. And my mysterious feeling towards him that kept on bothering me.
"Just a lot of things, Sean. Don't worry about it," ngumiti ako sa kaniya.
"Can't you... can't you share your problems with me?"
Huminga nang malalim si Sean at tumuloy sa pagpasok sa library. He walked towards me and caressed my cheeks with his finger while I remained staring at him silently.
"I noticed that since the beginning but I can't seem to ignore it anymore, Blaire. I need you to talk to me... to share your burden with me. I am your husband, wife. But it seems to me like I don't know anything about you."
"Sean, I'm okay," ulit ko sa kaniya. Because I'm telling the truth. He may be causing me headaches right now because he is the center of the problems but he is unknowingly curing me, just by staying beside me.
But he doesn't have to know that... not yet.
When he saw the resolve in my eyes, he eventually gave up the argument which made me smile. Always the conceding one.
"How about you, my dearest husband? When are you planning to share your burden with me?"
"Huh?"
Lumayo ako sa kaniya at lumapit sa lamesa ko dito. I showed him the invitation I got from the East Palace. He isn't mentioning anything to me but I know he is aware of this. We both got invitation kaya alam kong mayroon siya nito.
"Ah, that... I forgot to ask you," he said and I waited for the next line. "Can you represent both of us?"
I blinked at him when I felt a pang of disappointment in my chest. I thought he was going to ask me to be his date, how wrong I was. Muntik ko pa ipahiya ang sarili ko.
"Do you have prior appointments?"
Kasi alam kong wala. I have his schedule as he have mine as well. Hindi ko naman palagi tinitignan pero nagkataon na gusto kong malaman kung wala siyang gagawin sa kinabukasan para dito.
He slowly nodded at me. "Your sister... uhm, she asked me to accompany her to buy something for your Kuya Vince. A bribe, she said. Kaya kailangan niya ng opinion ng isang lalaki."
Hindi agad ako nakasagot kay Sean. Part of me wanted to voice out my opposition about his appointment with my sister but the other part of me... just want to keep silent and let him realize what is going on.
Sean isn't the type to thoroughly analyze something. What you let him see, he will believe that. He will give you his entire trust kaya hindi siya maysado magiisip ng ibang bagay. But I'm hoping that he will see my sister's intention on his own and decide.
Whether he will reject my sister's feelings or be naive to everything that is happening around him.
"Blaire," he called me. I spaced out in front of him kaya tumango na lang ako sa kaniya.
I smiled at him. "I understand, Sean. Don't worry about it and just... help my sister, okay?"
Matagal siyang tumitig sa akin bago tumango. I placed the invitation back on the table and walked towards him. "Let's rest for today, hmm?"
Wala siyang naging sagot sa akin pero giniya niya ako papalabas ng library. His hand was snaked around my waist as we walk towards our room. Gusto ko lang matulog muna nang mahimbing. And maybe, I'll have the answer to my problems once I wake up.
It was the next day when I woke up a bit late pero sakto lang para sa paghahanda. Dahan-dahan kong inalis ang yakap ng braso ni Sean sa akin at tumayo sa kama. Dumiretso ako sa bathroom para maglinis ng katawan at lumabas ng naka bathrobe.
Sean is still sleeping, hindi ko alam kung anong oras siya natulog pero alam ko mas nauna ako sa kaniya dahil mas pinili niyang patulugin muna ako.
The attendants immediately assisted me in preparing my dress for the event. Simpleng peach dress lang ang isusuot ko. It's a v-neck for the top with leaves and roses placed on both sides of the v-line. For the bottom, it's flare type skirt with the same details as my top.
I just let my hair down and wore my ring and earrings. Matapos ay nagsuot ako ng silver heels at kinuha ang hawak ng attendant na clutch bag. Sinilip ko muna si Sean sa loob ng kwarto bago umalis.
When I saw that he was sitting on our bed while rubbing his eyes like he just woke up, I went inside and showed him my look. He looked astonished kaya natawa ako. Then he tapped the space on the bed kaya umupo ako doon.
"I felt like I am seeing an angel," paos na sabi niya.
Natawa ako bago tinapik ang pisngi niya. "Then you must be still dreaming, Your Majesty."
He didn't say anything pero tumitig lang siya sakin. Then he held my face with one hand while the other remained on the bed.
"I want to kiss you..."
***
Here is a visual for Blaire's dress:
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