tucker carlson x ben shapiro x michael knowels

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request by: whydIjoin

literal genius request

I love this so much.

OK.

so.

this took me a wee bit longer to write.

but eh.

ok.

get ur bleach ready.

also I am so sorry if you don't know who these ppl are lol American political figures (specifically right wing) partaking in homoerotic activities for the irony is funny lolz.

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tucker carlson pov. (a few weeks ago I hit someone's car and his name was tucker #lolz)
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I hate gay people.

gay people shouldn't exist.

like what the fuck.

gross.

I also hate Joe biden.

mf made the gas prices go up.

hES rUiNiNg aMerIca 😢

but yeah.

gay people.

they suck.

suck DICK-

and they just fucking suck like why do you exist you motherfucking fa-

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Michael knowels pov
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I hate gay people.

they r gross lol

so r women. I hate women.

that seems fruity, no?

not liking women? hmmm.

anyway I hate gay people but id suck trumps dick.

ok author can we move on from a homophobic republican rant and get on with the storyline?

ok so I'm doing something at the fox News hq

like, me and my bros r doing something for TV.

so me, tucker carlson, and Ben shapiro r doing live interviews!

we're sat in like a semi circle in front of a camera doing question things.

so cool.

but not rlly.

Ben looks- sick?

idk he's acting off

we're going to the bar afterwards so maybe I'll check on him then.

but for right now- I get to talk about how the election was rigged and my deep burning love for capitalism!

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lil subby Benny boo shapiro pov
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sitting in the fox News headquarters with tucker and Michael talking about our hate for gay ppl has- an effect on me.

I'm horny.

i have a raging boner.

and it'd not from a woman that's for sure.

and I'm pretty fucking sure you can see my boner through my stupid khakis.

every so often I shift uncomfortably.

its- hot in here jeez.

I cant wait to get our of here.

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