Life & Love of the Tormented

Chapter Twenty Four

Everything is blurred and one of my eyes won't open. There's a loud voice behind me. Or maybe it's in front of me? I can't decipher where it's coming from and I can't make out the words. There's a subtle rhythmic pounding sound all around me, it's muffled but feels like it's in my ears.

  I'm frozen, fear and panic has filled my bones, but I can see my limbs moving completely involuntarily. My entire body is on fire but there is a numbness that covers my scorching skin.

  Where am I? What's going on?

  I glance up and see his face. He's holding my hair. It's balled in his fist. He's yelling at me and spit is hitting my face in the wake of where his other fist had just been. His eyes, they burn into me, setting my face alight with terror...

  I haven't seen this face in such a long time...

  Where is everyone?...

  I was certain he was gone...

  Wasn't I?

  If I am alone with him I surely won't make it out of here alive...

  It's Jed...

  And he's making promises to kill me...

A replay of the memory, from the last time I saw him plays in my dream.

  The dread I feel is paralysing but I can't seem to wake up though. It feels so real. I can hear his voice as if he were actually in front of me.

  I try to scream but no sound comes out of my already tightening throat.

  Somebody help me. Please.

  PLEASE!

"Amelia wake up! Amelia it's okay you're safe please wake up!".

  My eyes fly open, I'm sweating and crying and I can't breathe.

  A blood curdling scream escapes my lips.

  I can feel hands and arms covering my body, holding me.

  It hurts, everything hurts.

  Don't touch me!

  Get away from me!

  "Amelia please baby it's me", the voice says.

  I can't stop screaming, I'm pushing against the arms that hold me. Fighting as hard as my exhausted body can. I'm terrified.

  "Baby come on, it's okay, you're safe, I've got you, I promise".

  My eyes open properly and I see him. His beautiful blue, kind eyes are focused on me. They're full of worry and fear of his own.

  Carter.

  I begin to calm. I'm shaking, inhaling deep breaths.

  He strokes my head as he pulls it close to his chest.

  "It's okay, it's okay", he says into my hair.

  I'm gripping at his arms for safety and can feel my fingertips digging into his skin.

  After I've calmed and my breathing is finally steady, I release Carter's arm and he pulls back just enough to look at my face.

"Amelia, what happened?", he asks in a soft cautious tone.

  I can't seem to find my words, I've become muted by my trepidation.

  He cup my face in one hand, "You can trust me, I promise. I'm not going anywhere, just please talk to me. What happened in your dream?", he coaxes me to speak.

  I look at him, his eyes begging for me to take comfort in him. To bare all my secrets and be completely stripped, showing him all that is inside this fucked up head of mine.

  "Can we please shower first?", I breathe. I feel dirty and tainted.

  "Okay", Carter agrees.

  I drag myself off the bed and head toward the ensuite before stopping abruptly to turn around. I hold out my hand to him.

  "Please...", I say softly, looking down at my feet. I suddenly feel vulnerable and raw in front of him.

  "Please come with me?", I ask with pleading eyes.

  Carter looks hesitant but climbs off the bed and puts his hand in mine. I let out a breath I was unaware I'd been holding in while waiting for him to respond.

  In the shower I let the water cascade over me, it's hot and feels good on my skin. Washing away last nights alcohol consumption and night terrors while slowly releasing my tight muscles.

  Carter stands behind me, one arm wrapped around my waist, hand spread across my belly button, grounding me. I feel safe. I lean my back against him and close my eyes.

  I jolt forward, my eyes fly open and I've torn myself away from Carter, pressing my body again the cold tiles of the shower wall.

  My breathing has quickened and panic is crushing my chest, throat and vocal cords.

  "Amelia?", Carter questions, "What happened?", his face is pulled with concern over my sudden change.

  "I just keep seeing...", I can't seem to get it out, I'm hyperventilating.

  "When I close my eyes... His face", I say in gasps, while trying to get a hold of myself.

  Carter reaches for me and pulls me against him, tighter than before, our wet bodies melding together as if they were one.

  "I've got you Amelia, you're safe", he says into my wet hair, planting soft kisses on my temple.

  Once I've calmed again, Carter takes my red loofa and applies body wash to it. He presses it to my skin, making circular motions across my back, gently gently scrubbing every inch. The sent of jasmine and sandalwood fills the air, dancing with the steam that surrounds us.

  He continues, moving slowly over my shoulders and down each of my arms. I turn in his embrace so my front is now against his. I tilt my head back while he continues over my stomach and up to over my chest and neck. It's such a non sexual, intimate, most perfect moment.

  He directs me back under the falling stream of water, allowing it to rinse away the suds before pulling me back into his caging arms.

  He holds me still, hard against him. Breathing into my wet hair, reassuring me that I'm safe and letting our hearts beat in time with each others.