Life & Love of the Tormented

Chapter Thirty One

  I walk into my room and sit down on my bed to unlace my boots.

  Fuck you Colton! Could you not shut your stupid fucking mouth for five minutes!? He is such a fucking shit stirrer!

  Even though what happened between him and I is ancient fucking history I don't want Carter to feel any kind of way. I don't even know why I care so much but I do...

Hopefully we can pretend nothing was said.

Maybe Carter didn't hear it.

  Fuckkkkkk.

  I don't want this to be awkward especially after the hand holding thing...

  "So... I'm sorry to ask this but what was Colton talking about?... The last time you and him what...?", Carter asks me interrupting the internal debate I was having.

  "Don't listen to him okay?", I say as I shake my head and roll my eyes, trying to stay casual.

  I stand and stretch up onto my tip toes and give him a small kiss on the cheek before walking into the ensuite to tie my hair back.

  Carter follows me, his curiosity obviously getting the better of him.

"Amelia, can I ask you something then?", he asks.

I know exactly what he's going to ask and I don't really want to engage in a stupid fucking Q and A.

  "Just don't worry about Colton", I say before turning back to the mirror to wipe the smudge of eyeliner from under my eye. "Please Carter".

  I'm trying desperately to dodge this topic like the fucking plague...

  "Have you two slept together?", Carter blurts out. He drops his head as soon as the question has left his lips. I think he already knows the answer and is avoiding eye contact with me to soften the blow...

"Do you really want me to answer to that? Because I feel like you already know what I'm going to say... And honestly would it matter if we had?", I ask, becoming slightly irritated with the uncomfortable conversation. Why are we even discussing this?

  "I thought you said it wasn't like that with him?", Carter asks.

"Oh my fucking god!?", I say with a heavy sigh, "IT. IS. NOT. LIKE. THAT! Not any more anyway!", I announce.

  "But you have before?", he asks quietly, eyes cast down.

  What the fuck? Does he want to upset himself right now!? I don't know why it fucking matters!?

  "Yes okay! Colton and I have fucked! We used to fuck ALOT! If we didn't pick up on a night out we used to come back to the house together!"

Fuck, that may have come out harsher than I intended but he was fucking asking so it's his own fault!

  "Oh", he says, realisation filling his big crystal blue eyes.

  "Is that what you wanted to hear Carter? That one of my best friends used to be my fuck buddie!?".

"No it's not! But I don't know why you wanted to hide it either!?", Carter says raising his voice slightly.

  "I didn't, I just didn't think it was a big fucking deal!", I yell back.

  I don't want to fucking argue about this and I need to calm down before I say something I will regret.

  "Look, he's my friend Carter. We've been friends for years. Yes we've slept together but it was and never will be more than just friends who fucked. And the last time was about two years ago", I don't know why I'm trying to reassure him but I don't want him to think anything could or would ever happen between Colton and I again.