Zodiac High

*Lunch Detention*

*The Zodiac signs scurry to different sections of the room, claiming their territory, while Mr. Space is scrolling through his Google Pixel 5.*
VIRGO: Are you sure you need all of us in here?
MR. SPACE: Would you like join your buddy, Gemini, in after school detention?
*Virgo jaw drops and turns to Capricorn.*
*Capricorn shrugs as he eats his buffalo chicken wrap.*
*Virgo sulks in her chair.*
*Mrs. Retrograde struts over to Mr. Space's desk.*
MRS. RETROGRADE: Mrs. Zodiac needs you.
MR. SPACE: I'm in the middle of a lunch detention.
MRS. RETROGRADE: It will only be 15 minutes. Plus, Mrs. Mercury classroom is next to yours. I can tell her to keep an eye on your delinquents.
VIRGO: I don't know about the rest of them, but I'm not a delinquent.
GEMINI: You're in detention, you're a delinquent like the rest of us.
VIRGO: You belong in detention.
LIBRA: Stop with the innocent act. You're just like the rest of us in here.
VIRGO: I have standards.
MR. SPACE: Enough with the back and forth bickering!
LIBRA: She started it!
MR. SPACE: I don't care who started it. *Removes himself from his desk.* If I come back or Mrs. Mercury tells me any bad news, everyone is getting a week of lunch detention.
LIBRA: That's so unfair!
MR. SPACE: That's life! *Exits out of the classroom with Mrs. Retrograde.*
SCORPIO: This is so stupid.
CAPRICORN: Blame your classmates.
ARIES: And look at the Cap acting all innocent like he wasn't apart of all this drama.
CAPRICORN: *Turns around.* Y'all bring the drama shit to me!
LEO: No we don't!
AQUARIUS: You tried to fight me when I asked Libra to the Homecoming dance while you were dating Taurus.
TAURUS: Why are we bringing up this painful memory?
LIBRA: Because you're a thot. *Takes a sip of her Sprite.*
TAURUS: Ha! You're the one who got pregnant.
LIBRA: And you're the one who pretended to be pregnant.
*Taurus gives Libra the finger.*
LIBRA: I'll break that fucking finger!
AQUARIUS: Not when I'm here.
LEO: You ain't going to do shit.
AQUARIUS: You ain't shit.
LEO: You wished you were the shit like me!
AQUARIUS: Nobody doesn't want to be you!
LEO: But your girl wants me over you.
TAURUS: I don't want you Leo!
LEO: Then why did you lie about having my kid?
TAURUS: Because...cause...
GEMINI: Leave her alone!
SAGITTARIUS: Says the girl who exposed Taurus' fake pregnancy to everyone!
GEMINI: You can shut the fuck up! No one didn't ask for your input! Stay on mute like your buddy Pisces.
SCORPIO: Don't drag Pisces into your mess!
GEMINI: This doesn't involve you.
SCORPIO: You mentioned my baby.
SAGITTARIUS: Facts.
GEMINI: I'm so glad we're over! I don't know what I had seen in you.
CANCER: Leftovers.
GEMINI: What?
CANCER: You love other people leftovers.
LIBRA: Like your friend.
GEMINI: Blame your boyfriend! He couldn't resist me!
SAGITTARIUS: Because you don't have quality.
TAURUS: That's so fucking rude Sag! How can you say that to someone that you loved?
SAGITTARIUS: Who said I loved her?
VIRGO: Ouch!
GEMINI: You're a fucking liar!
SAGITTARIUS: The only girl I love is taken.
PISCES: I think everyone should take some edibles to relax and forget about all the drama that has happened in the past.
GEMINI: Oh. Now you want to speak.
PISCES: You gotta calm down.
GEMINI: I am calm!
SAGITTARIUS: Yeah...sure.
TAURUS: You caused this! All of this shit is your fault!
SAGITTARIUS: How? I'm not the one who tried to ruin someone else's relationship.
GEMINI: You're the one who opened your mouth about the threesome because you couldn't get one.
LIBRA: She's right.
CANCER: Sagittarius did caused all of this shit.
VIRGO: Causing a division among our friend group.
CAPRICORN: Some us of aren't—
SCORPIO: All over a stupid threesome.
SAGITTARIUS: Aries shouldn't had told me in the first place.
ARIES: You're the one who announced it to the whole world.
SAGITTARIUS: You had a threesome with my girl and her best friend.
GEMINI: Oh. So, now I'm your girl.
SAGITTARIUS: You know what I meant.
LEO: You're the reason why Libra got mad at me.
SCORPIO: Nah. That's you.
AQUARIUS: This is also Aries fault.
ARIES: Shut the fuck up.
VIRGO: I mean, you did cheat on Cancer.
*Cancer and Aries glance into each other eyes and quickly look away.*
LIBRA: That's mean you cheated on Cancer with both Taurus and Gemini. *Looks in Aries' direction.* Damn. You ain't shit.
ARIES: Says the girl who used to want me.
LIBRA: Get over yourself. You're not a prize and will never be.
CANCER: Libra!
LIBRA: He's the one who caused all the drama.
ARIES: Me? *Points at Taurus.* Taurus is always in your mouth 24/7.
LIBRA: Because she stole my man! You cheated on Cancer with two of her friends, and embarrassed her front of the whole school at Pisces' party.
ARIES: Sagittarius is the one who gave me the molly.
GEMINI: I told y'all Sag is the culprit.
SAGITTARIUS: You're the one who backstabbed your own friend. I wouldn't never do that. I have loyalty, unlike you.
PISCES: Facts.
GEMINI: Loyalty. Did you cheat on Celeste freshman year with a bunch of hoes.
SAGITTARIUS: You were one of the hoes I fucked when I was with her.
ARIES: Damn!
GEMINI: When we fucked, you told me that you guys weren't together.
SAGITTARIUS: *Laughs.* Everyone knew that Celeste was my girl.
GEMINI: That's why Aries fucks better than you! *Fist bumps Taurus.*
CANCER: YOU FUCKING DIRTY ASS SLUT WHOREBAG CUNT!
GEMINI: You're a dumbass for getting back with him. All he does is make you look like a fucking fool.
CANCER: Atleast he still wants to be with me unlike Sagittarius.
GEMINI: If I wanted to fuck him right now, he would be down to do it.
SCORPIO: You fucking bitch! You need your ass beat!
ARIES: And second, I'm gucci! Cancer is the only girl I want! Plus, your pussy was dirty.
*Libra eyes widens and looks at a smirking Leo.*
*Everyone laughs.*
GEMINI: But you still fucked me! And you fucked my best friend too! And Scorpio, I wish you would!
PISCES: You fuck anybody. No standards.
CANCER: The only person that's going to beat your ass, is me.
GEMINI: I don't fight pregnant women.
VIRGO: We should jump her.
GEMINI: I thought you were above the fighting.
VIRGO: I am but you deserve it.
TAURUS: If anybody deserves to get jumped in here, it should be Sagittarius, Aries and Leo.
AQUARIUS: Don't forget you and your friend.
TAURUS: Stay out of this, Aquarius.
AQUARIUS: You're the one who keeps embarrassing me. I can't believe I ever liked you.
TAURUS: You're lucky I gave you a chance.
AQUARIUS: Because Leo didn't want you.
LEO: Boom roasted.
ARIES: Times ten.
GEMINI: You're right Taurus. Guys ain't shit here.
SAGITTARIUS: Because y'all ain't shit.
GEMINI: And you still dated me.
SAGITTARIUS: Okay and?
TAURUS: Ignore the loser Gemini. He's mad because he will never have a threesome.
ARIES: Worse threesome in history. *Fakes puke.*
*Cancer giggles.*
GEMINI: Don't lie. You enjoyed it.
ARIES: Because I was thinking about Cancer the whole time.
TAURUS: More lies I see.
AQUARIUS: Says the liar.
TAURUS: Like we all haven't lied.
AQUARIUS: I never did.
TAURUS: You're lying now.
LIBRA: You're the only one in the room who's a liar, liar, pants on fire.
TAURUS: *Puts right hand up.* I'm not talking to you Libra.
LIBRA: I don't give a fuck.
SCORPIO: They both still need to get their ass beat.
GEMINI: You will never beat my ass.
PISCES: Yes she will.
GEMINI: Shut up!
SCORPIO: I won all my fights.
GEMINI: Same here.
SAGITTARIUS: My money is on Scorpio!
*Gemini slams fist on desk.*
SAGITTARIUS: Oh. And by the way, Libra 's wap is wayyyy better than yours.
LIBRA: *Smiles.* I do have good wap.
LEO: Bro. You could had kept that comment to yourself.
SAGITTARIUS: Bro. I'm just speaking facts.
LEO: Facts that will get your ass beat.
LIBRA: Calm down baby, it's not that serious.
LEO: Why are you defending him?
LIBRA: I'm not defending him. You're getting mad over nothing.
LEO: Do you still like him or something?
LIBRA: No.
LEO: You sure? I mean, you did get pregnant by him.
CANCER: Leo!
SCORPIO: Dumbass.
CAPRICORN: I hope she breaks up with him.
VIRGO: Me too!
*Libra removes herself from her desk, grabbing her Louis Vuitton tote bag, giving Leo the evil eye.*
VIRGO: Don't leave. We all will get in trouble.
LIBRA: I don't care.
SAGITTARIUS: You should had stayed with me baby.
*Libra rolls her eyes.*
MR. SPACE: *Blocks Libra's exit.* And where do you think you're going?
LIBRA: *Points at Leo.* Somewhere far from him.
MR. SPACE: *Glances at Leo and directs his attention back on Libra.* You're not going anywhere. You're still in lunch detention.
LIBRA: Let me replace it with after school detention.
MR.SPACE: Go back to your seat.
CANCER: Libra, come back.
LIBRA: NO! I want to leave!
MR. SPACE: Fine! Since Libra doesn't want to follow my rules, all of yall can go to Mrs. Zodiac's office.
VIRGO: This is some unfair bullshit.
MR. SPACE: I don't give a fuck.
GEMINI: *Grabbing Betsey Johnson mini backpack.* Did I do something to pissed off God?
SAGITTARIUS: No. You're just a backstabbing slut.