Scatter Hearts

5| Second Mistake

Journal Entry # 8 Wednesday, 11:28am 2017 

I was sympathetic towards Logan for some reason. I decided I would give it a try, and I didn't want to hurt his feelings.

I didn't want to leave Briar but I wasn't sure what to do otherwise. I didn't want to cheat on him.

I breathed in shakily, holding my phone. Our class was sitting in the cross hallway, the exit from the boys and girls locker rooms. We would wait for the bell to go to lunch, then to class.

Although I wasn't fond of starving all period, I was glad the time sped by quickly. We had our backpacks and lunch boxes out separately, unless someone ate the school lunch, and prepared to leave. The first few weeks we had to do this, the coach had to watch us to make sure no one left early. Now, I guess she trusted us to do what we were supposed to. I bit my lip as I opened the messages app. My breathing increased with nerves, and fear built up inside me.

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Journal Entry # 9  ??? am/pm (Some time in the future, telling the story)

I wasn't thinking when I texted. It just happened. I still remember the look on Briar's face as the lunch bell rang and I passed him. It stung. I didn't know what I was doing. While we still were forced to be in gym together, he never looked at me and I kept my gaze to the floor. Even when we weren't in school, or when we were and it wasn't gym, I still stared down at the rough tiles or the ground. I remember after a stupid little waste of time with Logan, that Mom told me what I've done. We were in the Jeep, going home from school one day. I'd told her what happened. She said I probably crushed Briar's heart.
I'm not sure why, but I never stopped to think of what might've happened to Briar.
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I cried that night. I looked up at my ceiling or my tan carpeted floor, and prayed to God. I begged and pleaded for him to forgive me.
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That went on for months. Over those months, in gym, Briar was beginning to talk to me again.

We grew close as friends.
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