Shattered | Hermione x Draco

Spilling Secrets

I'm awake early, very hot and we are all wrapped around each other, Pansy and Blaise are laying on both my shoulders, Theo and Daph on Blaise's side and Draco behind Pansy. I untangle myself from the pact, Draco raises his head, looking at me.

"Go back to sleep, I need to do something," I whisper.

He frowns, but lays back down, pulling Pansy against his front. My humanity blocks a lot of emotions, but I can still feel them if they are very strong. I turn my head and don't even change my clothes as I walk towards my Fathers chambers.

It is early but I know he is already awake. I knock and within seconds his annoyed face is visible. "Hermione," he is surprised.

"Hi, we need to talk," I tell him, straightening my back and taking the lead.

He lets me in and I stand in the middle of the room, looking at the bookcase. The order of books has changed. I quickly spot a few books that are out of place, noting that they are all books about dark magic.

"Tea? How are you feeling?" he asks and walks over to the small kitchen, preparing two cups without waiting for an answer.

He hands me a cup and waits for me to speak.

"I'm sorry," I start off, not really wanting to talk about yesterday. "I'm sorry for my behavior, I lost control over my life and I acted out. I shouldn't have and it was reckless, dangerous and stupid. I put our lives in danger and those of my friends. I won't do it anymore, but I need help. I need your help, please," I beg.

He nods. "I'm always here for you," his voice is soft and eyes clear.

The steam of the tea rises to my nose and I can smell the potion inside of it. It is a simple pain relief potion and the thought makes me smile. He didn't offer it, I didn't ask, he just knows that I need a bit.

"I need you to train me, you need to help me with Occlumency. It is not strong enough, Veritaserum still pulls the truth from me. I need a way to withstand it and protect my mind and I need to learn more magic, I need power," I raise my head.

"What kind of power?" he asks. "You already spend hours learning Ancient magic, I can ask Narcissa for other books, but I don't know how much more power you can gain."

"I feel the power of fire," I tell him. "It responds to my anger and I can feel the power running up my arms. With the right training I will be able to use it."

"Elemental power? That was only rumored to be possible," he frowns.

"I know I will be able to do it, I need to know how I can learn to reach that power," I feel my magic stir and it shifts my eyes.

The colors dim around me, but the details sharpen.

"How will you learn? Books?" He sounds skeptical.

I nod. "I just need some information on it, I can figure it out."

He turns around, walks towards his bedroom and it takes him a minute before he returns. "I will help you, I wrote a letter to Narcissa to ask for books. We will start training in a few days, I will prepare enough Veritaserum to train you with."

"Thank you," I sigh and relax.

"Now," he stares me down. "You are going to behave, join that club of Slughorn and keep your eyes and ears open for information."

"Will the Occlumency help with my humanity?" remembering the faint pain I could feel.

"In what way, feeling more or feeling less?" He observes me while frowning.

"Feeling less."

He shakes his head. "It is very dangerous to play with your humanity, one wrong move or spell and it is broken. The spell I used was like a dial, but I don't want you to change even more. It makes you cold and you will regret it."