The Jazz Fusion

Standoids: Excerpt by Jotaro Kujo + Marine Biology

Standoids are virus cells that produce Stands. They originated from the Planet Niburu, which is an ancient world where the gods once lived. They, along with their descendant races, colonized Earth constantly. I don't know why. But they were fairly interested in the planet.

Through research, I have gathered new intel from Standoids.

Particularly, the Standoids seem to become symbiotic with the Stand-User, similarly to the Klyntar. Originally, I thought that Stand-Users become evil when they use the 'Evil Spirit.' As it turns out, they only become more violent.

Standoids seem to be more spiritual than physical. When I was younger, I was completely out of control. Those who I wished to only knock down were usually killed because of the injuries that I gave them through Star Platinum. Standoids seem to be removing the humanity of any organism, making them more violent than usual. I've tested this by giving yet another rat, one which I named Bo Burnham, the Stand known as Ratt. As I have thought, it became much more territorial, violent, intelligent, and physically fit than the other rats. Writing this, I am beginning to have an existential crisis since this was just me when I became a delinquent around the time I began developing my own Stand.

Standoids also infect beings that are closely related to their current host through cosmic threads I like to call Divine Strings. Each string connects the host to his relatives, and the relatives will gain Stands as well, or at least, the potential of having one. However, if the relative becomes ill, it is because the original host who gained the Standoid Virus was infected by cells that are... Silicon-based... This was what I learned when Jonathan's body was taken by DIO. Relatives of mine, such as my mother, lost the will to live and became sick for 50 days. This was the same for Josuke, who lacked any willpower because he was a child. However, he was cured after somehow finding that willpower during that night at the storm. And when my Grandfather, Joseph, became a Vampire, I had to cast him away to another universe to protect my daughter, Irene, and make sure that she grows mentally stronger than she was during that time. I truly regret that decision, but it was for the best.

Now... The report about the Bikini Bottomites.

After seeing the Jazz Fusion, I have found out that two of their allies, Suponjibobu Sukuwepantsu and Paturikku Sii Suta, are an Evolved Sponge and an Evolved Sea Star respectively. It seems that marine creatures in the oceans of Earth-SB-129 seem to have evolved, and humans have stopped feasting on fish years ago, except for a few pirate groups.

One class of creatures is the Fish. Evolved Pufferfish seem to take the role of teachers and scholars in Bikini Bottom. There are also Evolved Anchovies who travel in schools and are a constant nuisance to society due to their raids. There are Evolved Sharks, who are feared by all as they feast on their brethren, and they live as leaders of criminal organizations, and others are soldiers. There are Evolved Whale Sharks, who are well known for their strength. There are Evolved Stingrays and Evolved Manta Rays, who are incredibly lazy. There are Evolved Sawfishes, who are Deep Sea Soldiers. There are also Evolved Angler Fish, who are known as leaders. And there are Evolved Flounders, who are known as brutes. There are also Evolved Bass, who are well-known critics. There are Evolved Swordfishes, who are knights. There are Evolved Tunas, who are writers. There are Evolved Blobfish, who are outcasts. There are Evolved Catfish, who are losers. There are Evolve Barracudas, who are architects. There are Evolved Electric Eels, who are lazy. Hagfishes are... hags... and witches... Flatworms are freeloaders. And finally, Evolved Sardines, who are the rest of the population that act as other professionals.

There are also unique creatures. One class is the Echinoderms. Evolved Sea Stars are known as dimwitted idiots in the world, often lazing around without the thought of their potential. Evolved Sea Cucumbers are known as scholars, or as I like to call them, repressed nerds... 

There are also mollusks, which are high in the social class. Except for Sea Snails, Sea Bunnies, and Sea Slugs, they are mostly sapient. Evolved Octopi are by far the snootiest pieces of shit I have ever met. These so-called scholars, artists, and high-class citizens are pessimistic, snooty, and incredibly easy to anger. I find them annoying, self-absorbed, and ugly. If I was given a chance, I'd happily beat the shit out of one. Then, there are Evolved Squids, who are actually quite nice and friendly, being known as scholars and high-class members as well. There are also Vampiric Squids, who look like Evolved Octopi so they could eat Evolved Octopi, which makes me chuckle with just the thought of it. And yes, I do laugh.

Crustaceans like Evolved Crabs are money-grubbing and greedy pirates, businessmen, and politicians. They are by far the closest thing to humans in this world. This is not the same for Hermit Crabs, who are hermits. Evolved Lobsters, Evolved Prawns, Evolved Krill, Evolved Isopods, and Shrimp, however, are known as warriors who once served Evolved Crabs. Evolved Copepods, meanwhile, are psychotic megalomaniacs. 

Whales, Orcas, Porpoises, Narwhals, Blue Whales, Grey Whales, Manatees, Elephant Seals, and Walruses are known as heavy-hitting soldiers. Dolphins, meanwhile, are known as royalty and gods in the oceans. This is the same for Mermen, Mermaids, and Atlanteans, who are immortal and rule the oceans as "gods".

Oddly enough, Mammals have also evolved like the Sea Creatures. They are usually intelligent.

Lionfish, Sea Bears, Dogfish, Yeti Crabs, Seahorses, Sea Cows, Sea Bunnies, Sea Monkeys, and Sea Rhinoceroses are animals that strangely look like our land creatures. There are Frogfishes, Gulper Eels, and other Deep Sea Life, who are known as monsters. Worms evolved into dogs. Snails evolved into cats. Clams are... birds... for some fucking reason. So are Scallops. And Pearl Oysters...There are also Nudibranchs, who are illegal because of their violent behavior. There are also leeches, who are just wild cats. And, there are Sea Slugs, who are tigers. There are Eels, who are dragons. There are Nematodes, which are wild pests that destroy corals. Amoebas are also very small dogs. Also, Cnidarians like Jellyfish, Sea Anemone, Coral, and Comb Jelly are like insects. There are also Evolved Sea Urchins, who are cockroaches. Barnacles are pests for Evolved Crabs' ships.

Finally, the most simple class of creatures in the whole ocean is the Sponge. They are well-known for being farmers and jellyfishers in the whole ocean. However, their potential is quite high. An example is Spongebob Squarepants, who I regard to be the greatest prodigy under the sea. He is an artist, writer, teacher, gourmet cook, actor, singer, dancer, and the current CEO of Nickelodeon Studios.