Through The Storm (Eminem Fan Fiction)

I Really Woulda Loved Your Smile

Valentina POV

Our amazing weekend in Los Angeles was over and we were back home in frigid Detroit. These March winters are something I don't think I'll ever be used to. I do enjoy when there's a blizzard though and Marshall and the girls and me get snowed in. Sometimes Marshall's daughters stay over too, and we just bake cookies, watch movies, and go outside to throw snowballs and build snowmen.

I settled back into the routine of getting Cassaundra off to the bus every morning, cooking or ordering dinner to be ready at five thirty when Marshall gets home from work every day and taking Bella to pre-school three days a week. I cherished those three days a week. Sometimes I'd go to the gym, sometimes I'd take a bubble bath or write in my journal, sometimes I cleaned the house even though Marshall said I don't need to, and that he can afford a maid. It was wonderful to have all these months to myself to grow. It gave me time to think and decide what I truly wanted to do with my life.

One day when I was picking Bella up from school, it just hit me like a ton of bricks. One of her little classmates has a baby sibling and I saw him in the car seat with a swaddle blanket and car seat cover. I remember my girls when they were that little. Their soft skin was always so warm and smelled sweet. I longed for the feeling of love and safety as I held my sleeping babies, but that perfection never came.

To have a child with Marshall would be a totally different experience from what I had before. I never had a baby with someone I was in love with. And I wouldn't have to worry about having enough money for clothes and food, or getting hit, protecting the baby from all the chaos. I would be able to take care of the baby safely in our comfy home with a crackling fireplace with a rocking chair in front of it to rock him to sleep in and a new sturdy, warm crib for him to lay him down to sleep. Marshall would come home from work smiling, kiss me, then kiss our little bean and it would make me so happy. It would make us so happy.

My little girls would love being big sisters! And it would be so special to watch them with a new little sibling added to our family. If I got pregnant right now, the baby would be born next winter. Maybe I should wait a few months and time it so baby would be born in the summer and then the girls would be on summer break to get to know their new brother or sister. I wondered if it was a difficult procedure to have an IUD removed.

Marshall and I had now been engaged for four months and I had baby fever!

After we put the girls to bed that night, I sat with Marshall on the couch watching some murder mystery show waiting for the right moment.

He stood up as the microwave dinged, "Want some popcorn babe?"

"No. I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You haven't said two words to me all night."

"Marshall, we need to talk."

"Oh fuck." He chuckled, "That doesn't sound good."

"I just need to ask you something. It's very important to me." I muted the TV and turned to face him with my knees tucked at my chin.

Marshall set the steaming bowl of popcorn on the coffee table and stared at me with concern.

"Marshall, do you want any more children?"

"Are you fucking crazy? No! We already have five kids between us." He dismissed me and unmuted the TV.

"I know. I know. It's stupid, huh?" I sat back and he looked back over at me knowing full well I wasn't over it. "But honey, what if it would be a boy?"

"It's not anything because we're not having any babies." He muted the TV again and his voice became panicked, "You're not already pregnant, are you?"

"No, no. I have an IUD. I would need to get it taken out."

I continued to sit on the couch with my arms now wrapped around my legs where I rested my head and tried to hide my eyes.

"Val, c'mon. Val." Marshall stood before me to wipe my tears. "I hate to see you cry baby, but I can't have another kid. And I won't."

"Oh. Ok." I got up and started making my way to bed.

He called after me, "Are you serious? It's that much of a dealbreaker for you?"

"No Marshall. It's fine." I made my way to the bedroom and tried the best I could to muffle my sobs with the pillows, but I'm pretty sure he heard me.

Marshall POV

"Do you see what these motherfuckers are saying? Budden says that Untouchable is the worst song he's ever heard in his life. In his life?! Has he heard his own shit?" I continued going crazy with the pen.

Porter chimed in, "Don't listen to that shit dawg. The climate is weird right now with this mumble rap phenomenon. Who the fuck is he to judge?"

"Charlamagne called the BET cypher weak. Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Fuck him too. All he does is talks shit." Porter kept observing me as I grumbled and put my phone away after checking it for the hundredth time. "What else is going on Marshall? You've been pissed the fuck off for the past two days. It's not just cuz of these assholes in the press."

I sat back to let out a frustrated sigh and threw the pen, "Val wants a baby man."

"What?" Porter stared at me while I looked down and sighed. "What? She's not already pregnant, is she?"

"Nah! At least, not that I know of." I cracked my knuckles and offered my reasoning in frustration, "My kids are all grown man, Stevie's already a teenager. I don't want to start all over again at the beginning, that's the last thing I need."

"Did you explain all that to Val?"

"I tried man; she went upstairs crying. We haven't even talked in two days. She hasn't texted me all day for the second day in a row." I got my phone out again to find no texts or missed calls. "See? That's never happened. Val's my girl, I need to hear from her throughout the day."

"The two of you need to talk. She wants you to make her feel heard Marshall. This obviously means a lot to her."

"Hey, I'm not having any more kids and that's final. That would mean sleepless nights, changing diapers. I'm not doing all that shit again man. It was a great time of my life when my kids were babies but that chapter's over."