Stop Using Me {suna x uke male}

chp: 60

(M/N) stared at the women in his arms. His eyes wide as she gently smiled up at him. Her right hand was covering her neck, blood cascading her hand. The bullet had skimmed her neck and blood was pooling out at a rapid pace.

He tried to deny she was his mother, but then he tried to deny that she was dying in his arms for the second time in his life.

He wanted to hate her for never coming back, for never getting him. He wanted to hate her for knowing what he was being put through and never once showed herself. Wanted to hate her for staying with that monster who had shot her. Wanted to hate her for letting him slowly become a monster and a weapon.

But all he really wanted was to be that child he was before she died. Cooking in the kitchen with her and laughing like they were the perfect family. He just wanted to be hugged by her again, to feel the warmth and love he never got after she supposedly died.

He closed his eyes, his eyelids shut gently as he looked at peace. His breathing was unsteady. He was just doing everything in his power to not kill everyone in sight, including the ones on his side.

He opened his eyes when he felt a bloodied hand cup his cheek. He looked down into the (E/C) eyes that belonged to his mother.

They were practically identical.

She shifted her hand to his pant's loop -since he was shirtless- pulling him down slightly. He bent his neck over as his ear was right next to her mouth. And she whispered words he thought he would never hear again. Along with a surprising comment about who his actual father is, but no context on where to find him. He would have to do that himself. She reached up and put her hand over his heart, gently patting it as if he were a delicate glass painting. He felt her hand slowly drop. With blood being left behind on his heart.

He quickly caught it, kissing her palm before letting it fall to the ground.

She died with her eyes open.

Her hand fell in everyone else's view, Inarizaki watched the whole thing but they couldn't hear anything- he closed his eyes once more and a single tear dropped from his right eye. That was the only tear he let drop. It slowly trickled down his face, taking its sweet time to fall, he didn't bother to wipe it. And when the tear finally fell off his chin it landed right under his mothers right eye. Going down her cheek, it was as if she cried with him in her final moments.

He opened his eyes and put her down fully. Putting his fingers to her eyelids, closing her eyes. Not wanting her to see what he was about to do. His hands covered in her blood. His back straightened and Jay knew what was about to happen.

He grabbed the back of Koda's shirt. "We need to get out of here." He said, not caring how loud he was being, he just needed to get his point across.

"What? We can't leave him!" Koda protested.

"He can handle himself." Jay began to yank Koda's shirt, "If we don't leave we'll be joining the dead."

(M/N) ignored those two, he knew they would leave eventually. He looked at his hands, each person he's killed began to resurface. It's as if the blood added more and it was just a waterfall. He sometimes hated his mind and how he never forgot a face of his target. His ears blocked out every noise, but he could still hear Jay and Koda. That was the only sound not blocked.

(M/N) fell back and stared blankly. "I watched her die. I held her in my fucking arms, covered in her blood... TWICE. And you're telling me she was alive this whole time? And as soon as I get her back she's gone once more? Do you know what it's like to think you had no mother? Have your childhood ripped away, having a set life for you? A path you can never stray from because it's all you've ever known?"