Stop Using Me {suna x uke male}

Chp: 23

Warning: slight angst

(M/N) turned his back, now facing Suna as he answered the call.

"Hello?" He answered, keeping a neutral face.
"I don't know how I should tell you this..." Alizer trailed off, mumbling incoherent words.
"Tell me already. You know I hate it when you beat around the bush, old man." (M/N) clenched his fist, wondering what the hell was so important that his peaceful time with Suna was interrupted.
"You're right, I'm sorry." Alizer sighed, "It's about Jay..."
(M/N) raised an eyebrow, "Well he always gets himself into trouble, maybe try talking to him. Or I can, he can get pretty scared of me, it's very fun-"
"(M/N)!" Alizer raised his voice, "I understand why you're rambling on, you are preparing yourself for what I'm about to say."
"There's nothing to say!" (M/N) said, his face faltering a bit before going back to neutral, "Jay's an idiot, we all know-"
"Jay's in the hospital."

(M/N) flinched at the tone. He didn't want to believe it. He clenched his phone even more, he stayed quiet. His breathing began to stagger around, trying to calm himself.

"(M/N)?"
"You're lying..." (M/N) whispered, "Jay would never be stupid enough to get himself badly hurt... again" His face now went to a broken one, a face Suna had never seen before. "He's way too strong too." He whispered.
"You need to accept it, there's a possibility that he won't-"
"He'll survive! He's... he's my right hand man, he'll never leave me." (M/N) wanted to throw his phone, he wanted to hang up and cry. Jay couldn't leave him, Jay was his best friend, his first everything. Not that his father needed to know that.
"I'm sorry, I'll send our location. You can visit him."

With that the phone call ended, (M/N) stared blankly at the black screen. Waiting for it to light up with the location of Jay and his father.

"Angel?" Suna asked quietly, walking towards the absent minded male.

Suna put a hand on (M/N)'s shoulder, the male flinched at the sudden contact. (M/N) shifted his eyes towards Suna, trying to keep his act up. But he wanted to fall into the taller's arms and break down, his eyes gave it away. But he didn't bother giving in those temptations.

Jay would survive, he had to.

"Angel?" Suna asked again, "Who was on the phone?"

(M/N)'s eyes watered at the thought of the phone call, but he quickly blinked them away.

He wouldn't cry, he couldn't.

"No one..." (M/N)'s voice cracked.

Suna frowned, "You can tell me." He began to pull (M/N) for a hug, hoping that he would feel more at ease.

(M/N)'s phone vibrated, he quickly shoved out of Suna's arms and looked at the message. Finally, what he's been waiting for. The location of his best friend.

He quickly began running, ignoring the calls from Suna. He didn't look back, he didn't see the hurt on Suna's face. He didn't notice the pain in Suna's voice.

All he cared about was Jay. He glanced back at his phone, running towards the garage.

"(M/N)?" Kita asked, but the said male kept running.

Passing anyone without a greeting, he couldn't hear them. He found the garage quickly for once, hoping in the nearest car. He opened the garage and started the car.

He didn't care for the speed limits, he was gone.

His eyes let tears finally flow down, silently. He was breaking down with no one there to comfort him. Why did it have to be Jay? What even happened?

His knuckles gripped the steering wheel, he didn't stop gripping them, not even when his knuckles were white. He needed to hold something, he needed the feeling of something.

He found the hospital, immediately pulling into a parking spot closest to the entrance. He got out, locked it and ran in. The adrenaline was wearing off, he was beginning to pant.

"Jay!" He ran to the secretary, almost falling from stopping so suddenly, "Jay Akumo." He used his last name, knowing Alizer put it under their surname.

She looked at him in pity, "An older man already came with him, he's in the waiting room. Jay has gone into emergency surgery. No visitors allowed at the moment."

(M/N) felt his world crumbling, he needed to see Jay. His father said he could, why couldn't he? This wasn't how this was supposed to go. No one was supposed to be injured.

Once the words finally processed in his brain, he looked directly in the secretary's eyes, she flinched, he took a shaky breath.

(M/N)'s face paled, he anxiously tapped the counter, "Where's the waiting room?"

She pointed behind him, "Pass three rooms before turning left. One more room than a right, you should see the older man."

(M/N) quickly nodded, he sprinted that way. He repeated the directions in his head, going the way she told him. He arrived at the waiting room, seeing only his father in there. His father was looking down.

(M/N) took a deep breath, quickly putting on his blank facade. He calmly walked to his father. Alizer looked up when hearing the footsteps, he stood up and slowly walked to (M/N).

He reached over and put his hand on (M/N)'s head, ruffling it a bit before pulling him into a hug.

"It's okay to show emotion." Alizer whispered, "You don't have to be strong at the moment."

(M/N) clenched the back of his father's shirt, shaking slightly. He didn't want to, he didn't want anyone to see him like this. But he couldn't help it.

Tears finally fell, he was holding back sobs. His sniffles were getting louder by the second.

"What-" (M/N) took a deep breath, sobbing slightly, "happened?" He buried his face in his father's coat. Choking a bit on his tears and air.

"He was walking around town, when a drive by happened. They shot him twice, but he tried moving away. They rammed their car into him, making sure that this time he wouldn't get up again."

(M/N)'s sobs ceased, sure, a great sadness was deep within him... but now anger filled him.

"Who?" He choked out.

Alizer straightened up, he gripped (M/N)'s shoulders a bit before pulling away from the hug. Looking into (M/N)'s eyes practically glinting red, but (M/N) still had a blank face.

"Last time I told you something, you went on a rampage and killed a lot people."

(M/N)'s face immediately dried up, "Same people from the White Jade?" His voice dropped deeper.

Alizer hesitated, but nodded to the question.

(M/N) turned, "Call me when they allow visitors..." He began walking, "I'll kill them again."

"Grieve first." Alizer said, (M/N) stopped in his tracks, "If you kill them when you still feel like this, your emotions will get in the way. You could get seriously injured, I can't lose you too."

"Don't worry about me." (M/N) said, walking away.

He was just going to grieve first, but in a different way than expected.