Angel Face

Fifty Two

28th July

Harry

I had met up with Gemma, Lou, Tom and Sam - Lou's twin sister, for lunch. Lux was scribbling away and I couldn't help but think of Sienna.

Harper and I have been texting whilst she could, although I was on a break she wasn't and was up early for shoots which meant she was falling asleep early too.

"So how's Harper?" Lou asks hesitantly.

"She's.. she's okay,"

"She didn't reply to me so I didn't know if she was or not,"

I swallow, Harper was trying to distance herself for a bit and although I understood, it was quite difficult explaining it to others. "She's really busy,"

"Yeah, I might just pop round later."

I thought the conversation about Harper was finished, but clearly it wasn't.

"Are you two okay?" Gemma asks, everyone was silent awaiting my reply.

"..Yeah," I answer with a sigh. "She's just really..doubtful of me, so we're kind of just taking it slow now, I don't want to push her and expect things so it's just a matter of giving her space,"

"So you're on a break?"

"We haven't broken up," I snap. I felt guilty for snapping at my sister but I didn't want others assuming. "We just need time,"

The table was silent as I finished my lunch, I was under a lot of pressure from all corners. The media were writing stories, my family wanted to know what was going on, the boys wanted me to join them for recording constantly.

But if you asked me what I wanted to do, I'd say I want to go back to a few months back when Harper, Sienna and I had a lazy Sunday together.

We didn't look at our phones or laptops, we just focused our attention on the three of us. I made pancakes and we ate them in bed whilst we watched Toy Story, Liam had borrowed it to Sienna because she said she hadn't seen it.

Then for lunch Harper drove to a local food deli she liked, Sienna and I laid the table while she was gone.

After lunch we watched Tangled, Sienna and I fell asleep and when we woke up Harper was ordering a pizza.

"You alright there?" Gemma prods my rib.

"Yeah, sorry.. tired."

"I asked you what dessert you wanted," She laughs.

That's when I looked up at the waitress and blushed with embarrassment. Turning back to Gemma I mutter another sorry before explaining I wasn't having a dessert. I was trying to keep on top of my fitness, and I really didn't feel like eating much anyway.

. . .

30th July

Harry

"Do you know where Zayn is?" I hear Niall ask as he and Liam scroll on their phones.

Louis was stuck in traffic - we were round at Liam's supposedly having a lads night, but Zayn hasn't been in touch. Not since we got off tour.

Sophia, Eleanor, Lou and Lottie were also having a girls night round at Harper's. The girls had finally persuaded her to hang out - which is something as Harper is so stubborn.

"He's probably with Perrie," I answer.

"He's always with Perrie," Liam mumbles.

We were all silent, but we all agreed.

"Pizza!" Louis called out the second he walked in.

"Pizza?" I frown. "I thought we were having Thai,"

Niall shrugs obviously not bothered what we were having, he was just excited to eat.

. . .

Harper

All of us were giggling at each other as we each slathered on our home made face masks. The only person who seemed to have gotten a good consistency was Lou, mine was far too sticky, Eleanor's too. Lottie's was almost perfect but a bit too much liquid and Sophia's was really lumpy.

"It's safe to safe I am no good at face masks," I admit as I sit there with it just on my cheeks.

"It's not about the result, it's the taking part." Lou laughs as her perfect concoction sits perfectly upon her face.

"Is there anything you're not good at?" Sophia pouts wiping hers off.

Lou nods. "Plenty,"

"Name one," I suggest. "We all should name one." Somehow the fun, girly circle had gone from face mask making to a confession circle in 1.5 seconds.

Lou shrugged. "Driving," She then looks at Lottie who's mixture was slowly making it's way down her face.

"History," She confesses. "And keeping in touch with people," She looks a little sad, as if something really hit home for her.

"Doing the dishes," Sophia blushes. "Liam always does them,"

It was my turn, I could think of a million and one things i'm not good at - I'm the wrong person to ask, I could give you a list from now until Christmas of all the things I believe I'm no good at. "Art," I dumbly answer. I didn't want to weigh the evening down by giving a deep and thought out reply, it is girls night after all.

"Being on time," Eleanor blushes.

"So what are you all good at?" Lou asks.

Lottie sat wide-eyed as we looked at her waiting for an answer.

"Er..art.."

"Makeup," Lou answers without hesitation. "And hair, I hope." We laugh with her.

"Baking," Sophia smiles sweetly.

It was now my turn to sit wide eyed. I had no idea what I could possibly say I'm good at. I've never had a passion for much, I was never into dance, or sport, or art. I was always one of those kids who just floated at school, neither liked or disliked; I was invisible to most except Edie and teachers. "Being a mum,"

The girls all give me looks of affection, nodding in agreement. Although I didn't do it the conventional way, or the 'right way', it doesn't make me a bad person. There is no way i'd take back having Sienna, the past three years or even having a child so young, it's made me who I am today, and if I hadn't of done it that way - who knows where I would be now? Bored and stressed in some uni dorm wishing I was anywhere but there. That's how I know..

Having Sienna was my fate.

Because fate led me to Harry, or Harry to me if you see it that way. It led me to my career, and where I'm sat right now, having girls night.

"Wearing skinny jeans," Eleanor blushes.

I roll my eyes. "You can't have that one, pick another."

She sighs. "Politics, I guess."

"Well you are studying it at uni," Lou jokes.

Everyone laughed, Eleanor joined in but I saw something else written across her face as I watched her closely, whilst others accepted her laugh and smile, I for the first time realised that it wasn't just me who had secrets.