They call me a criminal

Chapter 87

I started gasping for air, and Snape grabbed onto both me and Draco's shoulders pulling us along behind Bellatrix. "What the hell was he talking about?" Draco whispered. I couldn't even answer him I was trying so hard to contain my sobs.

Snape had ahold of my wrist so tightly I was basically being dragged behind him. I reached out for Draco's hand as we got close to Hagrids hut. He was just as pale as I was.

"HE TRUSTED YOU. SNAPE, CLARA. DID YOU HEAR ME HE TRUSTED YOU." I saw Harry sprinting across the field. "I TRUSTED YOU CLARA." He raised his wand firing a curse at me and Snape. I stood there basically like a ghost, I couldn't even try to defend myself. I didn't even believe what I just did.

As they fought, Bellatrix put Hagrids home up in flames. My knees gave out and I fell to the ground gasping for air. "Clara," Draco whispered. I let out a small cry, "Draco, I'm pregnant." His face fell and it looked as though he had stopped breathing for a moment. "Let's go Clara." Snape had a hold of my wrist again. "Wait." I begged him trying to reach out for Draco but he just stood there staring at me. "DRACO. DONT IGNORE ME THIS BABY IS YOURS."

Before he could answer Snape took me and we landed at the safe house. "Clara," he whispered. "DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME. GO. LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE. GET OUT."

He looked at me calmly for a moment and then shook his head slowly making his way towards the door.

I collapsed onto the ground screaming. I was using the wall for support.

Dear Remus,

If you haven't heard or you have heard what I did I want you to know how sorry I am. I had to do it, for this baby, and for Draco. Although I don't think he'll be speaking to me again. No one will. Dumbledore told me to leave the safe house and go back to a certain place that means the world to me. If you can find me, I would love to see you. I need you right now. Please believe me, none of this was just choice. I love you so much.
Love,
Clara

I wiped away the last of my tears slowly forcing myself to send that letter and grab the bag of things that had been waiting here for me. I looked inside and saw clothes, muggle money, food, and some sort of gps map thing.

I threw the bag over my shoulder and began my walk to the Black house. A few people stopped me on the street asking if I was alright. I'm not sure what was making them ask that, maybe the scars that covered my arms, could be the tears stained onto my face or the fact that I was a teenage girl walking alone at nighttime with only a backpack. This is what one of those rock bottom moments must feel like. I surely had hit rock bottom.

I angrily ripped the GPS out of my bag holding it up in front of me. A giant golden arrow formed pointing to my left I turned to look at it and I saw some sort of door. It didn't look like it led to anything it was just there in the middle of the street. Carefully I opened it, I looked around me I had no where better to go so I stepped into the doorway immediately feeling myself get lifted off the ground.

I landed on a bed, and when I sat up I realized I had made it to the Black house. I looked down realizing I was on Sirius' bed. I closed my eyes, and they didn't open again until the next morning.

Isolation didn't do me very well. In fact I had become more depressed than I had ever been. I never turned any lights on, I had to force myself to shower. Using this baby as an excuse to keep myself lively wasn't working anymore. I could barely tell I was pregnant, you had to study my stomach for a long time to realize there was a slight bump and it had already been five months.

It was typical of me to throw up every morning though. That kept me aware that I was indeed having a child. This kid made me eat, I'll give it that. It wasn't fair for me to punish this baby just because I wanted to punish myself.