An Aesthete - A triangle love story

Chapter 16

Veda

Is she not willing to meet me?

It's been two days since I sent her the letter and I'm yet to receive a response from her. I didn't know whether my letter had reached her. If she had sent her location to Girish, he would have informed me by now but he hadn't called me yet. I couldn have shared my contact number with her through the letter. But I don't want to force myself into her life.

I'm already asking a great favour from her.

Since I knew of her existence and until she promised her father, I was in her life but now I'm not sure whether I'm in her life. In these two years, at least after my mother's death, I could have let her in. My shrink was advising me for the past few months. But it took me some time to cope up with my misery.

For the past thirteen years, I didn't know anything other than my mother and my artistry but I lost them both. I was lost without understanding what to do next in my life or how to take the next step. Yes my mother said that I should not let anyone in or go out into the world as the world can be cruel to me. But the world loved my artwork.

The only person my mother was afraid of was my father and the only person who hated my work was him. She feared that he might again try to erase me if the world recognised me as his son. She asked me not to use his name behind mine. Though we were in the same city, she tried to keep our existence invisible. But even after her death, I stayed in holding on my promise to her without realising the promise died with my father's death.

When he is no more, why should I hide away from the world?

I didn't realise that loophole in my promise until a couple of nights ago. But staying inside the house has kind of built a fear of the outside world. That's why, though I wanted to let Darshana into my house, I'm hesitant to let her close to me. I guess I have conveyed myself well in the letter but I'm unsure whether she will find the loophole in her promise.

Though Girish blabbered about Darshana on the night of the fire accident, he was shocked to learn that I knew about her already. Then he revealed that Darshana works for Hridhay but he used to pressure her with a lot of work.

"Avan unga appa mathiri maritan da. Ashok used to feel that he is doing a lot of things in your father's style. Last night, Ashok didn't return home. Seeing your paintings in the hotel where they had a meeting, he scolded Darshana, manhandled her and drank a lot. So Ashok and Darshana had to stay with him. Darshana hates him." (He has transformed like your father.)

Whatever Girish said, I couldn't accept it about Hridhay. Yes he hates me as our mother chose me over him and I envy him for his freedom but I couldn't believe he turned into a monster. Until we were together, he has always been with our mother more than me. He used to help her in cooking and gardening. More than others, I knew him well even before we were born.

If he had changed into my father, he wouldn't have run behind Darshana into the fire to save her.

That's what gave me the courage to take a step towards him. After our separation, I tried to be connected with him but he always pushed me away. But this time, I'm positive that he will respond to me. The first step in my approach is my message to him in the letter for Darshana. Now she is my only hope to come out into the light, get connected with him and if possible connect back with my art.

But everything lies in her reply which I haven't received yet.

"Una veetla theduna nee inga ninutu irukiya!" Girish rolls his pants and stands next to me, letting the waves touch his feet. (I was searching for you inside the house but you are standing here.)