Love is Stronger than Blood (Snowdrop Oneshots)

74- tell me

Over six years before the events of Snowdrop.

===

"What are you thinking about?" Kangmu asked, gently wrapping Hanna in his arms as the two sat on the couch in his apartment's small living room.

"How did you know I wasn't reading?" Hanna asked, glancing up at his face from the book she held in her hands.

He shrugged. "Little hints. You're a fast reader, but you haven't turned the page for a while now. Your eyes weren't moving across the page like they would if you were reading. And you tend to bite your bottom lip when you're concentrating, but you weren't."

"Damn," Hanna whistled softly.

"So?" he prompted with a soft smile. "What else were you thinking about?"

She marked her page and closed her book, putting it down on the coffee table in favor of snuggling into her fiancé's arms. "Nothing much."

"Tell me," he prodded. "You know you can tell me anything."

"I was just thinking..." Hanna mumbled. "We're engaged, but I don't even really know what you do for a living."

Kangmu's spine immediately stiffened in alarm. He should've known she'd become more curious about it as time went on.

"I mean," Hanna continued. "You told me you work as a cop, but you don't detail what you actually do. You don't have a police car, and you don't work at the station..."

He had to tell her what his real job was. If she was going to marry him, she had the right to know. He just had to hope she wouldn't break up with him on the spot.

"I'll tell you," he said. "I'm going to tell you everything, now. Just, please... don't freak out, okay?"

"Now you're scaring me," Hanna said, pulling away from him.

"Anniyo, you don't need to be scared," he said, keeping a gentle hold on her shoulders. "It just might be a bit much at first. But I promise, I'm being perfectly honest. You have a right to know these things."

She took a deep, nervous breath. "Okay. Tell me."

"I work for the Agency for National Security Planning," Kangmu began. "My father was also an agent. I applied when I was nineteen, two years after Abeoji was shot and killed by a Northern spy. I swore to honor his legacy and carry on his work by becoming an agent and working to hunt down Northern spies like the ones who had murdered him."

"Kangmu..." Hanna whispered in disbelief. He paused, combing his fingers through her hair, but when she didn't say anything further, he continued.

"Completing military service was a requirement for joining the agency," he said while undoing a tangle in her hair. "I served twenty months in the military, and was accepted into the ANSP just before turning twenty-one. After training, I was sent all over Europe and Asia to study languages and customs while gathering intelligence on the North's presence in several different countries. A few years later, I met you."

"You've been an agent all this time," Hanna murmured. "And you never told me?"

"Mianhae," he said, removing his hands from her hair. "I'm not supposed to tell anyone besides my immediate family, and they're sworn to secrecy. I didn't want to scare you away, or put you in danger."

"Danger?" Hanna echoed.

"Your father is an extremely wealthy and influential politician," he reminded her. "If the wrong people know you're also engaged to an ANSP agent..."

She shook her head. "You worry too much. We're safe here in Seoul. Even Northern spies wouldn't dare go after private citizens just for their connections. Imagine the diplomatic scandal that would cause."

Kangmu decided not to argue or tell her about all the horrible things he'd seen agents from both sides do to each other and their families in all sorts of settings, capital city or not. If someone powerful enough really wanted something done, they would find a way to make it happen.

"I just don't want to risk anything. Least of all you."

"Is that still what you do?" Hanna asked. "Is that what your business trips are?"

He nodded. "It's been pretty quiet around here for the past couple of years, which is good. I rarely have to go more than a few hours away from Seoul now."

"It's not boring?" Hanna asked. "When you were used to traveling so much before?"

"Trust me, jagi, those trips were anything but relaxing. And besides," he hugged her tightly. "My home is Seoul. You're here. My family's here. When it comes to the agency, boring days without any crises are good days."

Hanna laughed softly, curling into his arms. "Do you have a code name?"

"Amado..."

"What?" she asked eagerly. "What is it?"

He chuckled. "Why do you need to know?"

She pouted exaggeratedly. "Because I'm your fiancée. And you're not supposed to keep secrets from me."

"Fine," he relented, squeezing her waist. "Black Tiger. My code name's Black Tiger."

"Black Tiger," Hanna repeated, testing it out. "I like it."

"That's good," he said with a peck to her forehead. "Just never use it in front of other people, okay? Not even my siblings know my code name."

"Then why did you tell me, when you didn't tell them?"

"Because that's how much I trust you."

Hanna smiled. He smiled back, and she leaned up to capture his lips in a slow, sweet kiss. Kangmu immediately reciprocated the gesture, parting his lips and sucking her bottom one between them. Hanna's breath hitched as he nibbled on her bottom lip, relishing the sweetness of her favorite lip balm.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier," Kangmu murmured once he broke the kiss to allow both of them to breathe. "I didn't mean to lead you on. I just didn't want my job to affect how you see me."

"Nothing could ever affect that, sarang," Hanna swore, cupping his face and brushing a stray strand of dark hair away from his temple. "If I'm being perfectly honest, I would have liked to know sooner, but I'm glad you told me. You can trust me, Kangmu."

"I know," he kissed her forehead. "And I do, Hanna-ya. I trust you more than anyone."

"Make a promise to me," she whispered, running her thumb against the soft stubble on his chin. "No more secrets between us. No more hiding any life-altering information, okay?"

"I promise you, my love," Kangmu said. "I won't hide from you. You deserve so much better than that."

Hanna tilted her chin up and brushed another soft kiss to his lips. "I don't think I'll ever want anything more than what I have, sarang. Come hell or high water."

===

Anniyo: no

Abeoji: father

Jagi: babe

Amado: maybe

Sarang: love