Stronger Together (Kylo Ren x Reader | Maia)

Turmoil

Maia

I was... nothing. By the time I finished my speech, I felt nothing. I felt no fear, no anger, no hate. There was no despair, not even helplessness. I was nothing.

Perhaps it was by design. Maybe I shut it all out with a conviction that consumed everything. Or maybe my emotions had been ripped away, like so much else.

I spent the next four hours making a plan with Kylo, Luke, Hux, and the holos of my grand admirals, Leia, Ackbar, Holdo, and a few others. We had two main attack plans roughly drawn up with various fallbacks—Palpatine was left to Kylo and I—and I thought they were good. But Holdo looked as if she hadn't slept in a week, and even Kylo seemed to be drained. He kept running his hand through his hair, something he usually only did when he was in private—as he had to take off his mask—and only when he was stressed.

So I called it. We would adjourn in seven hours. When the New Republic holos faded out, we remained another hour talking to Hux before finally, Hux took Luke to his quarters, and it was just Kylo and me.

A flicker of emotion shined through me with the thought—finally alone with my... husband—but still, it was as if my emotions were turned off. Not down. Off.

I waited for him to ask me if I was alright, to stand and pull his mask to him while tugging up.

But he never did. I was not uncomfortable in the silence—though curious, maybe.

After a minute, he got to his feet and held out a hand. I gripped onto it lightly, and he immediately turned and walked me out of the command center.

I fell into step with him, a small semblance of normalcy. We did not speak, and the people we passed would salute, but I blocked them out.

When he stopped in front of a chamber with an unusual black door, I realized he hadn't just been taking me for a walk. I only noticed it was a door from the way it was pushed into the wall—but there was no handle, no key entry, nothing. It was just a massive black slab embedded in the wall.

Opening my mouth to speak, my jaw ended up hanging open when he crossed his hands in front of himself and split them apart. The sound of a heavy-duty locking mechanism turning, then the sound of an air release. A blast door? With what, a Force lock?

He gestured for me to enter, and I hesitated a brief moment before shifting.

Gods. How was it possible for a room this large to exist aboard my ship, and I not know about it? The Harbinger was to the Finalizer as this room was to a normal training room. Absurd.

"What is all this?" I asked quietly. It was a bit darker than a normal training room and had notches in the wall as if large sheets of metal weren't put together properly on half the room. They were too evenly spaced to not be done on purpose, however. There were two training droids that looked exactly like mine—which was unlikely. I designed them myself and gave the blueprints to our best engineer almost two years ago. He's on the Supremacy now, however, and has been for six months or so.

In one area of the huge room were three large crates, each perfectly on its own tile. Which, speaking of—the floor seemed to mirror the walls in some spots, looking like massive, metal tiles. There were random spots on the wall to my right that looked like fancy door handles, and I realized that was exactly what they were. Before he could answer, I counted six. Six doors to what?

"The room shifts and moves. I had read about them being used by the Jedi, so I finally had one made when I designed the ship."

"Are those my droids?"

"I got your guy to make them for me. I like them." He smiled a soft, warm smile. "He said you designed them."

I nodded a little and did a spin, trying to take everything in. On any other day, I would be immensely proud of them.