Bud

Chapter 27

I stood off to the side and watched as Petunia was shouting at Lily. Poor James was standing next to me looked worriedly at Lily. He had never seen her this angry before or shout this much. Sure she yelled at him but never like this 

"You sure we shouldnt go in?" James asks worriedly

"James, this is an everyday thing," i tell him with a sigh, "This is how it has always been. Im sure she will try to talk to Petunia after a few years so im sure you will have to deal with Petunia and her husband so you might as well get used to this"

"Cant you look and see whats going to happen?" James looks to me with a frown, "Actually have you tried looking into the future since the last time?"

"No, im a bit hesitant to try. I might look this years after we get back to Hogwarts to see whats changed. Hopefully things will change for the better"

I look around before spotting my dad going outside, "Im going to go speak to my dad for a moment. Have fun watching your future wife yell at her sister"

He nods letting me know he heard me so i walk away and head outside. My dad goes around the corner and as i follow i see him pull out a cigarette. I didnt know my dad smoked. Ive never smelt smoke on him nor seen him smoke ever

"Dad"

He jumps and looks at me quickly before sighing a bit, "Dont scare me like that Bud, i thought you were your mother"

"I didnt know you smoked"

"I quit before Petunia was born. These last few months have been so stressful though so i thought 1 maybe 2 would bd alright"

I nod in understanding and put my hands into my pockets as i look away and notice its starting to rain

"Dad, what are your throughts on gays?"

I could see him pause from the corner of my eye but i didnt look at him

"I mean, its there choice if they want to burn for eternity thats there choice. Why? Had a gay man tried to come onto you?" He now sounded worried and stepped closer to me making me look at him

Now i was even more hesitant to tell him about myself or Sirius but i figured it would be best just to tell him

"Dad, what if i were gay?"

He freezes. He stood there for a solid minute before i see his face harden and he takes a long drag on his cigarette. He blows it the smoke out and then speaks

"Theres no reason for you to ask that because your not gay. If you were you would no longer be welcomed in my home. I didnt speak in about gays when you and your sisters were growing uo because that would have been unkind however i will not have a gay-no fagget, living in my house. I definitely wouldnt let one have my last name or be apart of my family," i look to the ground but i hear him take another long draw on his cigarette before i see him toss the cigarette to the ground, "Best you get back to Lily. I dont want to hear anymore of this faggot talk and dont you dare bring it up to your mother. Shes stressed enough as it is with Petunia"

I didnt say a word as he walks, more like storms, by me and goes back inside. I didnt move from my spot for a very long moment. When i did finally move i turned and walked away. I walked away from the building and away from the wedding. I couldnt get to Hogwarts alone and i wasnt staying here for this wedding that i didnt even want to be at. So i walkes

Before i knew it i was soaked to the bone but i didnt care. I just walked and stared at the ground. When i did finally look up i found myself in front of the Potter's door. I knocked on it a few times before waiting

The door opens and there stood Euphemia looking confused, "Bud? What are you doing here? Merlin! Your soaked to the bone! Come in child come in!"

I walk numly inside, "Could you please take me to Hogwarts?"

"Hogwarts? Isnt Dumbledore coming to get you? Why arent you at the wedding?" She stands in front ofm e and gently grabs my face and makes me look at her worried motherly face, "What happened?"

"I tried telling my dad........Sirius was upset i hadnt told my parents......so i asked me dad.......what if im gay," i give a small dry laugh as i look away from her face, "He said i wasnt because if i was he wouldnt want me in his house, in his family, he wouldnt even want me to have his last name anymore"

She pulls me into a tight hug and i couldnt help but start to cry into her shoulder. She hugged me tightly without saying a word.

Once she pulls away i tale a few deep breaths and get the tears off my face. She smiles at me and rubs her thumb on my cheek cleaning my face

"Lets go outside, ill get you as close to Hogwarts as i can"

"Thank you"

She nods and leads me outside and waits till i nod. Once im ready i give her a nod and in the next minute we are at the boarder of the Hogwarts property. I was surprised to find 2 carriages waiting

"Dumbledore must have known you were coming early. Go on, write me if you need anything ok? Our door is always open for you and Lily ok?"

"Thank you Euphemia"

I get into the carriage and sit there silently as the carriage moves. Once it stops at Hogwarts i get off and instantly head to my dorm room. It was still dinner time so i knew id be alone. I went up to my dorm room and changed into my sleep clothes before crawling into bed and closing the curtains to hide away. I didnt even feel like unpacking all i wanted to do was be alone and just lay in bed. I didnt know what i should do. I either act like im not interested in men and get to stay with my family or i stay with Sirius and not go back to my family.