DECEPTION. ("Soap" MacTavish x Reader.)

chapter twenty-five.

The new room Y/n received was much better than the one back in Mexico, the walls were painted a light gray with a window set in the middle of the room to admire the beautiful snowy outside. It was a semi-permanent room so she had more space as well. There was a queen bed -praise the lord-, and her own bathroom. She didn't have many things to unpack so she got to lay down in her soft bed right away, the fabric softener on the sheets a soft and relaxing scent.

She didn't want to leave her room for a bit, her mind needing time to process all that's happened recently and what to expect in the near future. Soap and the other two had left not even two hours after settling into the Canadian base. How the situation happened replayed throughout Veil's mind.

"Think you can live without my devilishly handsome face to look at?" Soap had teased Y/n in his gear, Ghost and Target already heading to the helicopter that awaited the three, as well as some extras. After his words, he cringed, as he should, but he felt extremely light-headed at the moment, so he allowed whatever to flow out of his mouth.

Veil gently scrunched her eyebrows, a grin flickering onto her face. "I feel like you were looking for a compliment somewhere in that question," She replied.

MacTavish rolled his eyes, not wanting to lie and deny it but he also didn't want to throw himself under the bus like that. "Well, will you at least miss me, then?" He rephrased his question into a blunter one, starting to feel himself get nervous. He could die, and he always knew that since he joined this work field, but he was just uneasy about it now.

Caught off guard by his question, Y/n remained silent, just staring at him. Was he ok?

"I mean, yeah, obviously I will. It'll feel weird without you here bothering me," She threw in some teasing so it wasn't so sentimental. That would really feel like a goodbye. "And when you're back then we can have some freedom and hang out like actual friends, not just find each other randomly in the lounge room." She added that last part to show that he would be missed.

"Can't wait for it, then."

Maybe she should have given him a hug instead of a fist bump to the chest, but that felt too endearing. He rustled her hair in return, the feeling of her hair in his hands caused his stomach to churn at the time.

Veil closed her eyes as she began to sink into her bed, hearing footsteps approach her door then a pause. Three knocks.

"Come in."

The door slowly opened and Gaz entered with a little black teddy bear in his hand, his eyes meeting hers. He grinned at her softly, awkwardly looking down at the teddy bear then got closer to her bed as she sat up, giving the gift to her.

"Sorry if this seems weird. I realized I never really got you a 'get-better-soon' gift when you first got hurt. And now that MacTavish is gone for some time, I figured this could sort of comfort you as a temporary replacement, yeah?" Gaz and Y/n also barely talked, but unlike Ghost, Gaz approached her with kindness.

Veil held the soft stuffed animal in her hands, turning it around as she felt security in her heart. She puckered out her bottom lip to show she appreciated it, smiling up at Gaz. Relief seemed to compliment Kyle's face as she met his eyes.

"This is so sweet of you. Thank you so much," She looked back down at the bear, hugging it close to her, the stuffing inside softer than she thought. "Soap doesn't come close to this as a comfort."

Gaz nodded, the last part confusing him. "Aren't you two together?"

Y/n's giddiness suddenly disappeared, feeling like lightning struck her. She quickly looked back up to Gaz, tilting her head, "What? No, just friends. There's nothing going on between us."

Gaz raised his eyebrows as he brought his eyes away, moving his head back as he took in her words. "Could've fooled me," He looked back at her with genuine confusion, "so you don't see it, then?"

"I don't see us as a thing, no. He doesn't either."

Gaz chuckled, "You're kidding!" He was baffled by her response, then he added the important part. "MacTavish is seriously falling head over heels for you. He is down bad for you, Veil. Truly he is, I see it every day."

As if the shock of him asking if they were a thing didn't stun her enough, his last part caused her stomach to swarm. She was in denial though. She couldn't put a finger on why she refused to believe him either. Whether it was because she wanted Soap to be just her friend or the fact she thought she would've noticed by now, she really couldn't tell. She opened her mouth and closed it, lost in shock.

After a few seconds of hesitating, Y/n then finally spoke. "Thank you for the gift, Gaz. We can talk about this later, I'm just tired right now."

Garrick studied her for a second then understood, "I'll be in my room if you need anything. If I made you uncomfortable, let me know, ok?" After hearing her accept his words, he said goodbye and then left her room, softly closing the door behind himself

She let it sink in, Gaz's words seeming near impossible- but that was only because of the shock she experienced when he first said it, her eyes widening as she clicked things together.

Soap really did treat her with some romantic intentions; how he got defensive toward Jarvis about Y/n joining the Cartel and used his wife as an example. How he held her hand when she was waking up after her surgery. Sleeping in the same bed. The shower.

These weren't things she wouldn't be comfortable letting other people do, but what really got her was the realization that Soap's feelings weren't just one-sided.

How stupid she was. She felt butterflies swarm her stomach, glancing at the bear Gaz got, her thumb brushing over the material. So now what? When he returns do they just like keep acting the same or does she need to ask what they are? Maybe a date should be arranged...?

Somewhere in her mind, though, she felt dread. Having a relationship in such a risky job didn't sound ideal and caused her to feel nauseous. She would stay up worrying day and night if he would be dead, and how easily it could be for her to die and leave him alone made her feel sick. If she died, she wouldn't want him to move on- but they aren't even together, so what's she thinking? But the cons with dating were winning the battle.

She bit her bottom lip then turned around and laid in her bed. She can think about this later, for now she just wanted to sleep.