neighborly

nineteen - roman cant bowl

I regret kissing Roman.

I haven't seen him since day before yesterday, the reason unknown. Maybe I was avoiding him?
Maybe he was avoiding me?

The thing after you kiss someone is that then your left in a little haze, wondering if it will escalate.

If I see him, do I just kiss him again? Are we dating? Did the kiss mean anything to him? Why do I care so much? Why cant I freaking do eyeliner?

I think about the last question as I attempt to wing my eyeliner wing but it doesn't really wing. It gives more uneven line.

I sigh, and turn to Alina who was getting ready with me for the gala, " Does my eyeliner look fine?"

She glances over, "Yeah you look cute."

I stand there and think for a second, " Is your cousin avoiding me?"

"Doubt it. I think soccer shit because I haven't seen Marco in a bit." Alina applied lipstick to her perfect lips that I was jealous of.

I sigh out, "Thank goodness."

"Why would he avoid you? Marco and Asher told me they actually seriously saw him smile." Alina grinned and looked at me.

I blush, "It was like the best fifteen seconds of my life, Romans the best kisser i've ever kissed and when he grabbed my hair I was like dam-"

"Lily stop telling me how my cousin kisses."

"No its fine I don't actually care." Alina chuckles as she looks at herself in the mirror before leaning over and giving me a side hug, "I never see you anymore now that your in love with Alexis." Alina said with distaste.

Alina doesn't like Alexis even though I told her , (with permission) about how Alexis's boyfriend was still technically in the picture and she was trying to get her mind off of it.

Alina said she could've gotten her mind off of it in other ways that didn't include her getting off on HER boyfriend.

"If you would meet her, you would like her." I remind her for the thousandth time and Alina rolls her eyes. "Doubt it."

I finished my makeup and decide I don't know what do for my hair so I run the straightener through it multiple times. I put my earrings in and go search for my dress, which I put on.

It was the same black one Alexis gave me, long with a low cut top that was low enough to show but not low enough that my mother would come up from hell.

I put it on and look myself in the mirror before going to show Alina who did a whole act of dying dead when seeing me which made me slightly embarrassed.

I go to text Roman but realize my phone is broken and I physically couldn't see anything anymore. I watch Alina get ready and just talk to her about stuff, which was practically just her sex life.

"Sometimes I secretly hope they lose, which they never do but on the rare occasion." Alina raised her eyebrows and I laugh because I knew exactly what she meant even if I couldn't relate.

"But yeah, you and Roman just kissed so far?"

"Yeah, one single time."

"Make it two tonight babe." Alina said blowing me as kiss as she finished getting ready and looked so freaking good.

"You're like the prettiest person alive." I tell her truthfully and she smiles, "I hope my boyfriend thinks the same thing." before darting out of my bathroom to call Marco even though she was legit about to see him.

I wait around a little and realized like a little loser, that I missed Roman.

I pace around in my heels and check myself in the mirror fifty times, just to make sure I haven't morphed into an ugly rat. After my millionth check I started worrying that I actually looked horrible.