My little Judith

Eight

Alec POV

I was once again woken by giggles and little hands pressing my cheeks together. Judith sat on my chest waking me up. Only my eyes flew open when I heard a deep chuckle and a more softer one. Damien and Harriette standing at the end of my bed laughing at their daughter who always wakes me this way.

"Hi." I smiled a little. My voice deep and husky, full of sleep. "Sorry, I didn't mean to sleep so long."

"It's okay. Judith heard us home so she came wandering. We've only been back ten minutes or so. She was sat with us for five before she wanted to come and wake you up." Damien replied.

I nodded and sat up, wrapping my arm around Judith so she wouldn't fall as I moved. "She woke up from her nap earlier, wouldn't stay on the other side of the bed so I just went to sleep to. I'm sorry, that was irresponsible of me, it'll never happen again." I told them.

"It's okay, Alec. How do you think you get sleep in when you're a parent?" Harriette laughed a little. I nodded and looked down at Judith with a soft smile.

"You like waking me up, don't you?" I chuckled while she giggled. I tickled her making her giggle turn into a belly laugh that always makes me smile, the best sound that I have ever heard. Nothing beats the sound of her laugh.

"No, Alec stop." Judith laughed while trying to push my hands away. I stopped and just stared, a constant smile on my face. I don't want to sound creepy, but I could look at this girl all day. The amount of love and adoration I have for her is overwhelming. No actions or words can describe how I feel for this girl.

She makes me feel happy, content, calm, everything. But she makes me feel scared. I'm scared that if someone doesn't agree with me being around Judith because she's my mate and the age difference, they'll get into Damien and Harriette's heads, convince them that I'm not worthy to be around their daughter. I'm scared that someone will look at me different, think of me as something I'm not.

I refuse to hurt her, I refuse to let anyone hurt her. All I want is to be there for her, to protect her, to be a shoulder for her to cry on. I want to be her safety net, if she needs anything I am that person she can go to outside of her parents. The relief I feel that Damien and Harriette trust me to be around her. I'd never harm her, but I see what it's like for someone to be around their mate. The sexual desire, the desire in general to be around them.

I would understand completely if they didn't want me around Judith because of how much sexual desire mates have for each other. I don't feel that with Judith, I know I will and I fear for that time. I fear that, again, I will be viewed differently, I won't be allowed near Judith. She is everything to me and if we ever got separated I fear that it wouldn't end well for either of us.

"Alec." Judith said. I blinked and looked down at her as she laughed at me.

"We've been calling your name for a couple minutes." Harriette laughed. "Where'd you go?"

"Sorry." I coughed awkwardly. "Just...thinking." I sighed.

After a day of swimming in the lake, we all went inside to shower and change. I went in my room, Harriette and Judith going in Judith's room to change and shower, while Damien went to his and Harriette's room. Once I was finished, I went downstairs so I could start dinner for us all, before we sat down to watch a film before bed. Well, before Judith went to bed.

While I was preparing a salad for dinner, Damien walked in and sat down. I bit my lip, I want to ask, but again the guilt and fear is stopping me from ever saying anything to anyone. To just take one day at a time.

"Damien." I turned around. Well, no going back now.

"Yes mate?" He looked up from his phone.

"Uhm, well, I uh, uh, well. I don't really know how to say this. I-I, I don't want you to get the wrong idea at all. But I guess I should ask you about it, not that it's happening now, but I know it will when she's older." I rambled not looking at him. "I just don't want you and Harriette to lose trust in me, you can trust me I promise. But I just wanted to ask before it got to the point in my life..."

"Alec, stop rambling. What's wrong?" Damien cut me off looking at me. Worry in his eyes. "Is this about Judith? Has something happened?"

"No nothings happened. It's just, I know with mates there's a lot of emotion and one of them things I'm worried about. I don't want you to look at me any differently, I'm still me and I just want you to know that."

"Alec, just say it." Damien sighed.

"Uhm." I started, rubbing my clammy hands on my joggers. "What do I do, when I start feeling sexual desires towards Judith." I said lowly in a whisper. Not daring to make eye contact.

Damien stayed silent. My heart pounding in my chest as we stayed silent. This is why I didn't want to say anything, I don't want him to view me as some creep. Just thinking about it makes me sick, but I know these feelings will come around when Judith gets older. I stare at her as it is, I don't want the wrong idea of it being in someone's head when she's older.

"We'll cross that bridge when the time comes." Damien gave me a small smile and a sharp nod.

"Damien, please don't get the wrong idea. Judith is safe with me I promise. I don't have any sexual feelings for her at all. All I want to do is love and protect her while she can't do it herself. But I know the time will come, and when it does I don't want to be the bad guy. I know mates have strong urges when it comes to sex and I know it won't be any different with me and Judith. But she's so young and I'm an adult, I need to know what to do so I can prepare myself. If I need to leave so it doesn't make anyone uncomfortable I will, I'll leave. But I know this won't only effect me, I need any advice you can give me so I can not only prepare myself but Judith as well. Distance myself so she knows how to live without me being there constantly."

"I understand, Alec, I do." Damien sighed. "I don't know what to do. I understand more than anyone how much it's a struggle to keep my hands off of my mate. When the time comes, we'll try different things. You're not alone in this Alec, Harriette and I trust you. Some feelings aren't going to change that because we understand what it's like. The only thing that will change our thoughts about this is if you act upon those feelings."

"I will never hurt her. Ill keep it under control. No harm will ever come to her while I'm here. I won't let anyone harm her, including myself." I reassured him.

A/N: Double update for you guys. Hope you enjoyed this chapter, let me know what you think in the comments.