Lost Girls

Feelings

"Im so sorry I didn't mean to start crying I just- I'm going through a lot right now." my throat is tearing as I try and tell Rex what's going on.

"My boyfriend wasn't the best person but I loved him I really did and it hurts so much that all this happened... Like he was my rain and shine and even if we fought we'd talk it out and always come back better... But I don't know what to do anymore!! He meant the world to me, even if he didn't always treat me the best I loved him... And I should have never dumped him because someone else made me think it was the best choice... I threw away a relationship that was pretty good and that made me happy... I regret everything I did and I just wish he could know that even though he was a douchebag sometimes... He made me happy..."

Rex looks at me with her big blue eyes and her eyes tell me that she understands. I feel terrible for venting about everything to someone who shouldn't even care. I mean we weren't good friends or anything so I shouldn't have opened up that much.

"I understand... If I was him I would forgive you because you deserve love and you deserve to be somebody's world." Rex rubs my back and smiles. I try to smile back, but it comes off weak.

"And what about you? Do you ever want somebody Rex?" She looks at the floor after I ask and thinks for a moment.

"I already have somebody that's my world."

I sigh and wipe the tears from my face.

"Even if I ask him to forgive me... He's probably moved on... I really wanted the relationship with him to last forever but I could never get him to forgive me... Even if I begged i- i feel I've lost part of me forever... And in public he avoids me and I don't know how much more of this I can take... I hate this treatment and if he's trying to torture me it's working... I feel like giving up on the one person I truly believed in... The one person I truly loved..."

Rex hugs me and tells me it'll be okay, but I don't feel like it will ever get better...

"I'm just remembering all the good things and it's hurting me so much... Like how he used to kiss me all over and I wouldn't mind... My forehead, my ears, sometimes my nose and everywhere... I was mad at him at first but now I'm missing all the little things and I don't know how to tell him I still love him... You know?"

Rex seems hesitant after I say that and I worry she might be upset. She just hugs me and says "Liam isn't the only person who loves you..."

I watch her eyes move from the floor to mine and it feels like our eyes lock. Her deep blue eyes fixate into mine and I feel something inside me shift. Something I haven't felt since I was little. I feel a blush grow across my cheeks and nose and she starts blushing as well. We stay like that for a few more seconds before Rex breaks away and becomes very red. She takes in a quick breath and starts speaking to me. Well at least trying to.

"L-like your f-f-family! T-they m-must love you l-l-lots!" She rubs her cheeks roughly, as if that would remove the bright red coloring them.

"I though you were about to say you liked me."

I fixate my eyes on a piece of lint on the floor as I speak, to avoid her gaze. Those beautiful blue eyes don't just serve the purpose of looking innocent, they also beg me to say my true feelings about things I don't want to share.

"Well... that would be gay." She muttered, before bursting out laughing. I look up and see her smile, and it brightens my mood. I start laughing as well. I hug her and thank her for being there for me, before her mother opens the door to tell me I should get going.