I don't bother to stop and greet Scarlett, Rose or Colin.
All I want todo right now is go to sleep and eat as many snacks as possible.
I even leave my bags by the door as I push myself between Scarlett and Colin while entering the house, I hear all three of them turn around behind me as I make my way towards the stairs up to my room that is most likely empty.
I've only been here twice. And both of them times I had stayed for one night, my room never held anything on a personal level. It was just a simple guest room that was meant to be my own but Scarletts work always went before me it seems.
Just as I go to take my first step up the stairs, Colins voice makes me pause.
"We moved your room, I hope you don't mind JJ." my head drops at his words. I hate it when he calls me JJ, only dad and my friends call me that not him. Not even mom really, she rarely does, well when she speaks to me that is, it's always bug or baby but still I have to hold myself back from flipping out at him calling me that.
My whole body feels tense as I feel moms hand resting on my lower back, I flinch around as if her touch burns me and move up a step to create a distance between us. I don't want her touching me right now. I just want to be alone.
"Let me show you your new room bug." her hand moves towards mine but I pull my hands into my hoodie pocket to avoid her touch, I can't see her face flash with some hurt before it quickly changes into a soft smile and she nods down the hall.
That confuses me. Why are we going down the hall and not upstairs?
We make our way to what I use to believe was the door that led to the garage, well it wasn't a garage, garage. It was just a storage room when I was last here so now I'm just even more confused.
She opens the door as nods for me to walk down the stairs after she turns on the light. As I walk down the stairs only then do my eyes widen. She has made this whole garage/storage my new bedroom? The whole room is decked out with a massive bed, tv, and the biggest bean bag chair I have ever seen in my life. Another door on the side leads me into my own bathroom, filled with a shower, bath, toilet and sink. Opposite the bed is a couch facing another tv. I can see a mini fridge in the corner next to the other tv that Scarlett moves towards and opens for me to see.
I must admit it's really fucking cool but somehow my mind seems to wonder to how I suddenly feel as if i'm so far away from them in the house. My bedroom is downstairs or well underground. This house already has 5 bedrooms. Only 2 of them are even being used? Why couldn't they have kept me upstairs?
"You don't like it, I- we thought you'd want your own space. I had been waiting to show you it on your birthday" the sadness in moms voice makes me look up at her. I hate how I feel like I'm constantly on a rollercoaster with how my emotions are playing with me today.
I just stay silent, I think if I talk I'll tell her I like the room but I'm upset she didn't just decorate one for me upstairs, I'm worried she will see me as ungrateful and selfish. My own space is nice but I can't help but feel pushed away even more. Maybe I should just say thank you and let it go.
Moms sigh hangs heavy in the room as I turn to look at her. I'm sure I can see tears fill her eyes as she just nods and makes her way to the stairs. Just as she is about to take her first step, my words stop her.
"No I...I do, thanks scar-mom" the sadness stays on her face as she notices my screw up and part of me is even sad at the sadness that she feels, but that's not even worth half the amount I feel because of her.
She nods her head as she walks back up the stairs...
"I'll come let you know when dinners ready"
The door closes after that and I'm left standing in the middle of my new room in a house I feel foreign in. Filled with people I feel like I don't even know.
------
I make myself comfy in the bed and I just reflect on everything that's happened in the past 24 hours.
1. I got drunk and high with my friends.
2. Doing no.1 meant I broke my school's rules giving me another strike meaning I now had 3.
3. Because of no.1 AND no.2 meant I was getting kicked out of school at the ripe age of just 14, disappointing my dad in the process.
4. My dad is leaving for Australia and leaving me to live with my mom who I haven't seen in 2 years, with a little sister who I barely even know even though she is only 5. and Colin who again I barely even know too.
5. Feeling so alone in a place where my friends are hours away from me and I can't even go out or do anything because I'm still waiting for mom to have a 'talk' with me about the last 24 hours but I'm still hoping she decides not too because I know its just going to be an argument between us, well me.
"JJ, dinners ready" Colins voice makes me sit up in my bed as I hear the noise from upstairs come through my open door. I can't even find myself to hide my frustration as I storm my way up the stairs and follow the voices of my so-called family into the dining room where I stand at the door staring at Colin as if he kicked my imaginary cat.
"Don't call me JJ." My tone is far from gentle. If anything it slices the room and I can feel the tension I have caused from just 4 words right in front of my eyes.
Colins shoulders tense as mom stands up making her way towards me. I see my bowl of pasta sat at the seat that I was clearly meant to be sat in, in front of me. I manage to dodge Scarlett as I move to the table, pick up my bowl and leave the room towards my new bedroom far away from the happy family left in the dining room.
I guess this is my new life.
YOU ARE READING
LEFT BEHIND | Scarlett Johansson x Daughter.
FanfictionABANDONED - having been deserted or left. A relationship that seemed so easy to leave behind. A relationship that continued to spiral through the years as a mother makes a new life but seems to have somewhat abandoned her first. Left behind by her...