LEFT BEHIND | Scarlett Johansson x Daughter.

CHAPTER 33 - BROKEN PUPPY.*

I feel Tasha move the wand over my stomach, moms eyes turning even more intense as she keeps staring.

"Okay!" Tasha says and I find my head flinging into her direction. 

-------

Tasha turns off the machine and settles back down in front of me, panic stills my whole body as I can't take my eyes off of her. 

"So..." Tasha starts. 

"There is nothing on the scan at all which is good news, so we are still going to do the blood test to confirm if you're pregnant or not. But I am 100% confident that you are not." She finishes. Relief fills my body completely as I feel tears fill my eyes. 

Moms arms surround me as she brings me into her chest and I sob into her. Tasha has soon left the room to grab things for my blood test. I'm generally so happy and relieved right now, I'm not pregnant, well I guess I should let the blood test definitely confirm that first. 

Tasha is soon back in the room and she is taking my blood, I can't seem to pull my eyes away from the vial that is filling up with blood. I don't really know how it comes into my head but seeing the blood just makes me want to hurt myself. 

Part of me wished the needle that had gone into my arm had hurt but it didn't. If it hurt maybe I would feel the smallest bit guilty about wanting to hurt myself but I really don't. 

And now that is all that is worrying me. 

Me and mom just sit in silence as we wait for Tasha to come back with my results but all I can think about is that I want to ruin myself. I shouldn't be feeling that, right? Like I should be incredibly happy that I am not pregnant, that I am not going to have to worry about bringing a baby up so young or getting an abortion and having to worry about how far back it could take me mentally. 

I never expected a blood test to make me feel how I do now. 

"Okay so, the blood tests confirm you are not pregnant." Tasha says as she sits back down opposite of me and mom. 

"Do you have any idea what could have caused the false positives and how or why she hasn't had a period in 2 months?" Mom speaks for me as she stands up again next to me. 

"The periods could have a number of reasons, stress, trauma, weight loss. It's better to monitor it right now, especially when you now definitely know you are not pregnant. The false positives could be an evaporation line, that's where a faint line can appear to be positive, normally happens if you wait too long after test time. It could also be caused by a number of medications." Moms eyes fly to me then, and it feels like my heart breaks a little bit when I see the doubt in her eyes when medication is mentioned. I just block everything out after that.

 -------------

"Can we talk?" Mom asks as she walks into my bedroom. 

We haven't spoken a word to each other since we left the OBGYN. It's been awkward, I can feel the distrust flooding from her body. 

"Sure." I mutter as I close my laptop and put it to the side of me. 

"Bug, can you look at me?" She mutters as she sits herself down at the end of my bed. But I feel like I can't look at her, that I'm going to look into her eyes and see all the disappointment I have caused. But I still can't help but look up.

"Thank you, now can we talk about what happened today?"

"What is there to talk about? I'm not pregnant, that's a good thing" 

"Have you been taking anything behind my back?" Mom asks and I knew my thoughts were right earlier when Tasha mentioned medication. 

"Jesus mom, no. No I haven't, everything is locked away and I haven't even left the house without you!" I say back, frustration clear in my tone.