LEFT BEHIND | Scarlett Johansson x Daughter.

CHAPTER 8 - TROUBLED.

Scarletts POV

JJs words hurt. But I could tell my actions hurt her way more than her just telling me them. 

I didn't even know what to say to her. I couldn't find any words that could possibly try and explain everything to her. Not at that point anyway. 

As usual I did what I'm best at. I ran. I've been at my moms for 3 days. It's funny how she is my own comfort and I can't even do that for my own daughter. 

I've been sitting in my childhood bedroom for 3 days, only leaving to go to the toilet. I've been trying to go through everything from the past 2 years well since me and Liam divorced and when I was meant to have JJ and what I was doing instead. Most of the time I was working, the other times I was out with Colin or Rose was ill and Colin was working. 

I don't have any excuses for the way I've treated her and she knows that but I also need her to know she has never been the reason herself. 

That she never did anything wrong. Me and Liam split because it wasn't working between us anymore, JJ just never saw any of those moments. We made sure our arguments were behind closed doors. We never wanted her to see that, we wanted her to see her parents love each other. Even when we split we did love each other but it wasn't right anymore, for either of us and it broke me when I said I'd leave, he wanted to try everything to make it work but we had already tried the year before that, we stayed together for her but staying together for your child isn't the right thing todo. 

I was really lost when Liam and I separated. I threw myself into work as a distraction to how I truly felt. But I should have thrown myself into looking after my daughter and not losing her in the process. I had always been envious of how Liam was able to split his home life with his work life but for me that was physically impossible and at times he understood, other times he didn't. 

He knew how much my career meant to me and vice versa hence why we chose to put y/n into a boarding school and we had originally agreed to switch off on weekends but it just wasn't realistic with how my work life was. Even if I took her home with me, if I was working locally I would be working 15 hour days and she deserved all my time not parts of it so instead I just told Liam I couldn't take her and see her because of work, he only ever worked Monday-Friday my work was scattered. 

Again I'm not trying to make excuses for myself but that's how it was, and I've regretted it every time. I could have taken her to set with me but we never wanted her in the public eye. I stayed home when my bump started showing when I was pregnant and worked from home when I could, and I stayed home until she was 1, but worked picked up again but it was easier because I had Liam by my side to help. 

I don't know how he ever managed to keep her private, he wasn't 'famous' he was known for sure but not someone who would typically be put on covers of magazines himself, the photos he took? yes. He was always known as 'Scarlett Johansson's Husband' ; he never once complained about that. 

We shielded her from this scary world because it was easier then, than what it is now with Rose, given that paparazzi have more respect when I'm out with Rose and if she happens to be in the pictures her face is blurred out but she is living in this world. JJ never did. I don't even think JJ ever fully understood what I did for a living until she was older than what Rose is now. 

I need to go home and sit down with JJ and have an actual conversation with her, no arguing, no raising our voices. An adult conversation, because that's how she wants to be treated. She isn't a child anymore and I need to stop treating her so much like Rose. She is becoming a young adult, she is 15 in 3 weeks time, she is growing up. My baby is growing up and I've missed so much because I couldn't be an adult myself. 

I'm dragged from my thoughts when I hear knocking on my door, my voice telling the person to come in. My moms face is white as she just passes me my phone. 

"Scar, you need to come home now! I thought she would be back by now but she has been gone for 6 hours and I'm worried! I don't even have her number Scarlett! Come home!" Colins urgent voice speaks through the phone and he doesn't even get to finish everything before I'm already hanging up and getting into my own car and speeding off towards home. 

I'm happy the drive isn't too far and that there's barely any traffic. My mind is racing with all different thoughts right now, what if she has been taken? What if something has happened and she can't reach her phone? My brain doesn't stop once as I get out of my car and race through the front door of my house. 

Colin comes running towards the door with a crying Rose as he tries to explain everything. He says about how she was playing with Rose all morning and then around 2 her dad called so she went to her room to speak to him. Then at around 3 she shouted that she was 'going out' and hasn't come back since. 

She doesn't even know this area, she has been here twice and both times she hasn't even been able to stay due to me being called into work and Colin having already been at work himself. 

I instantly take out my phone and try calling her, it rings but she doesn't pick up. 

I call more times but it's still the same. No answer. 

I've never had to worry about this before, I never thought I would need to worry about it. 

My fingers move quickly on my phone as I dial 911. 

I explain the situation on the phone and not long after I have 2 police officers at my door. I show them a picture of JJ and Colin tells them what she was wearing this morning when he last saw her. 

My mind is going crazy. 

Has she run away? Or did she really just go out and was meant to come back? I don't even know what to think right now. 

Too much is happening in a short amount of time and I don't know what to do.