Doing The Dance (Jackson Avery Fanfic)

forty-seven

2017

"April? Where are you going?" I asked as I caught up to her.

"Leave me alone Dawson, I'm going to the hospital to check on some patients" I grabbed her arm.

"Stop, what's wrong? We were having fun!" She turned to me, her eyes burning with tears.

"Are you with him?" I stopped and she laughed through the tears. "I knew it, the way he danced with you. You're together, aren't you?"

"Yes, we are" I said, not quite believing this moment was happening right now. April laughed again.

"Then I suppose he told you what happened last weekend? He had to have. I knew something was wrong the minute you came into the ER from LA. You were so off, it's because he told you. Well, am I right?" I nodded.

"Okay, yes. We're together and he told me. I'm sorry April"

"You're screwing my husband. You should be sorry"

"Wait, you divorced him, you left him, and you're the one starting fights with him. He's allowed to move on, why do you care who it's with?"

"Because you're supposed to be my friend, my fellow, Taylor! Not his girlfriend"

"I am your friend! How many times have I let you complain about him to me?"

"All while you've been sleeping with him? When did it start? Tell me!"

"Not until February" April laughed.

"Like I believe that. I came home in December and the two of you were already living together, had been for months."

"April, you left him for six months to raise your daughter and run your ER. He was drowning. And I was spiraling living in my apartment. I helped him with Harriet one day and we agreed we worked well in the same house, so I took him up on the offer to move in. I never expected it to get personal, but then it did. And I felt awful about it because I had so much respect for you" April stopped trying to walk away and looked at me. "Look, you're either going to believe me or not, but I care about you April. I'm the reason no one knows, and it's been half a year. I couldn't do that to you, you're my boss and my friend"

"Yeah? I thought we were friends too, but I guess I was wrong" April said, folding her arms.

"I'm sorry, okay? I cared about you too much to tell you. And I wouldn't have after what you said to him. I was being selfish and I'm sorry" April cocked her head at me.

"What do you mean? How is that selfish?" I looked down.

"I was scared for my job"

"You were afraid I'd sabotage your fellowship?" I sighed and nodded. "Dawson, you're an amazing doctor. I could never do something like that to you"

"But you don't know what you would have done if you'd heard, especially from the wrong person. You were already weird with me in the ER just knowing I was living with him" April sighed.

"You know, it should have killed me seeing him look at you that way, the way he did when you two danced together. But in all honesty, my first thought was 'at least I like her'. He's had some questionable flings after the divorce. But if he was serious about you, at least I had respect for you. That made it harder. To know he was with someone who I admired. That's what killed me"

"April, you were nice to me before he was in that place. You're my friend. And I love him and Harriet, but I really care about you too. I wanna be your fellow, I wanna work in trauma with you as equals one day. But I can't stop loving him" April smiled and nodded through the tears. She reached out for my hand.