Our Story/TBS imagine

66

"Do you want to find out who they are?" I asked.
"Yes, but no. But I can't can I? Because they both died when their car exploded."
"But, they must have family members, I'll help you find them."

Hazil was having a breakdown to say the least.
She was barely saying the words clearly now.

But it's now so clear why she's so hateful. She's a lost, depressed, lonely and broken 15 year old.
She probably blames me for her parents death and probably thinks I'm trying to be a mother to her.

I didn't know what to say.

She was crying uncontrollably, her makeup was literally running down her face.
I didn't want to hug her, because she didn't seem like she wanted me too.
I really didn't know what to do or say.

"Hazil, I'm so-"

"I think" she blurted out "I think the hardest part of losing someone, isn't having to say goodbye, but rather learning to live without them. Always trying to fill the void, the emptiness that's left inside your heart when they go. And no matter how hard to try to fill that hole it doesn't work, like there's a small puncture in it you can't find. Does that make sense?" She was trying to hold herself together, I can't imagine how hard that would be.
I nodded. "Hazil, maybe-"
She interrupted me again. "I hate stupid goodbyes. Because, it's like you never know when your last goodbye is going to be, so surely you should make the most of it? Not just a quick 'bye' because, it feels like you will see them again, but, you could be anywhere at any moment and that goodbye becomes your last. I didn't say goodbye when I walked out of the car I said 'be back in 5' my last goodbye was the night before. I can't deal with that Y/N, it's killing me."

That hurt.
That really really hurt.
It's nearly exactly what I said about my sister, but in more detail.
"I can't say I understand, but I understand about saying goodbye." I told her about my family problems, I thought it would try to get her mind of things, I think I did for a while.

"So, in other words, Jace was a idiot, and he wrecked your family?" She asked.
"Pretty much."
"We are both messed up then." Hazil laughed but then started crying again "I'm so messed up." She screamed and buried her head in her knees.
"Hazil!" This time I pulled her into a hug and she accepted it and buried her head into my chest "I know everything is horrible right now. But me and Thomas will help you, just try and give us a bit more of a slack yeah?" I asked.
"Okay. I loved them so much Y/N, I didn't tell them for like a year because it was trying to be 'cool'. My so called 'friends' told me that it was uncool. " She began crying hysterically again. "I didn't tell them I loved them for other a year until it was too late, what the hell have I done?"

I felt a hand on my shoulder and I looked up to see Thomas.
"They knew, Hazil, trust me, they knew." It was Thomas.
He went and sat next to Hazil on the other side.

There we stayed in our own private corner, looking onto a pond. Calming Hazil down and watching the sunset shimmer over the water.