It's been 2 months since Y/N died. Camp starts today because of the euros, I'm excited but I'm also sad, Y/N said she would come to every game but now that isn't going to happen. The pain hasn't stopped, it's just becoming easier to cope with, I still have a breakdown here and there but Lia and Em have been angels and I know they are still mourning her too.
I leave slightly earlier so I can visit Y/Ns grave before I'm gone for 8 weeks.
"Hey Y/N/N", I whisper as I sit down at her grave and run my hand over the gravestone. "I always feel stupid for talking to you like this but I like to think you can hear me. I'm leaving for camp today, this is the first time I've felt excitement since you died. The girls are missing you a lot, you left a big gap in our lives Y/N/N. I want to hate you for it but I can't. I want to believe you've found peace knowing that Stone is dead and you did what you needed to do, but I'm gonna be selfish and say I want you here. You left me, you left me alone, how could you do that", I sobbed out trying to control my emotions.
"I should get going but-um, I love you, I always will, and you better be watching our matches from up there", I laughed out as I made my way back to the car and started my journey towards camp. Talking to her like that makes it slightly easier, a part of me believes she hears every word.
I pulled up at camp and I'm greeted by Keira and Georgia as they both give me a hug, "how you holding up?", Georgia asked and for once I feel like I don't have to lie and say I'm fine.
"There's good days and bad days, today is a good day", I said offering her a small smile as her a Keira just smile and drag me in the building.
"Leah, may I have a word?", Sarina asks politely as I nod and follow her into her office.
"I just want to see how you're doing", Sarina said as I sat down, "I'm doing better, it's hard but some days are easier than others", I told her honestly.
"If you need anything at all Leah, please don't hesitate to talk to me, we're all here for you", Sarina says softly as she grabs my hand making me choke up a bit, "thank you", I whispered.
Our journey in the euros has been good so far. I had bought a wristband with Y/Ns name on it and I've been wearing it during every game. Today we have our quarter final against Spain.
Straight from the whistle the game was tough, both us and Spain having many chances on goal but not getting the ball in the net which was getting frustrating. The first half ended 0-0.
The 2nd half was more intense and Spain managed to open the scoring which means we had to work harder to equalise and then get the win. We were in the last 10 minutes of the game when Toone managed to equalise as we all ran and celebrated with her. 5 minutes left.
We managed to get a corner in the last couple of minutes. Georgia swung the ball in and I ran and jumped, hoping and praying I timed it correctly. Shit. It went in, I scored. The cheers from the stadium were surreal, I ran to the corner flag and kissed my wrist and looked up to the sky. That little shit better be watching. I started to tear up as my teammates all crowded round me in a group huddle.
The game finished 2-1 which meant we were through to the semis. The girls all celebrated the win in the changing rooms, jumping and dancing about to the music, and for the first time in 2 months I feel alive.
We managed to win the semis and go on to win the finals. The celebrations went on for days after, I don't think any of us were sober for those few days but we all felt like death the days after. Y/M/N sent me a message the day we won the final which brought a tear to my eye, she said that she was so proud of me and she knows Y/N would be too. I hope I've made her proud.
Emily's POV:
Working without Y/N had been hard, it wasn't the same. I miss her more everyday but I'm glad that Stone is dead, I'm glad she got to do that. She wanted it to be her.
"Emily can I see you in my office", Paul said as I nodded and followed him.
"Whenever I found Y/N, she told me that Stone said there was someone he had on the outside who would kill everyone Y/N loves until she was dead, I need you to help me find out who", he said looking at me as I just sighed, "of course I'll help", I smiled at him.
"There's something else, she also said that Stone told her he wasn't the one that killed her father", I looked at him shocked, what? "Come on you can't believe that, he was probably just trying to get in her head", I said, not really believing my own words.
"Well we need to figure out if this person also killed Y/Ns father, be prepared for some long nights, and let's keep this between us, we don't know who we can trust", he sighed and I just nodded, knowing I'll do anything I can to end this, for Y/N.
It's been almost a year since Y/N died and we still haven't got anything on who this outsider could be. Me and Paul were getting frustrated and I tried to mask it to Lia and Leah a few times when I went home, just playing it off as being tired. Everyone has been doing a lot better though, we haven't forgotten about Y/N, it's just not as painful. I know Leah visits her grave when she can and I think it's sweet.
"Em take a look at this", Paul said with hope in his voice. "How didn't we see this before?", he mumbled to mostly himself.
"The abandoned building where we found Y/N, it used to be owned by Owen Stone, James Stones uncle", he said, both of us now hopeful that this is the outsider.
"Let's get him", I said determined as Paul nodded in agreement.
We managed to find Owen and had enough evidence to charge him, this should finally be over. I phoned Leah to let her know everything, she was annoyed I didn't tell her at first but she's glad it's over. I walk into Paul's office as he has just finished a phone call and he looks pretty anxious, "everything okay?", I asked concerned.
"You should probably sit down Emily", he said nervously. "Shouldn't we be happy that this is over?", I asked laughing as he nodded in agreement.
"Yes but there's something I've been keeping from you, a decision that wasn't made lightly but we thought it was best", he spoke clearing his throat.
"We?", I questioned, confused as to what he was saying, but that look in his eye told me everything I needed to know. I tried to keep my calm but it was hard.
"Please don't tell me you're saying what I think you're saying Paul", I said sternly, fists gripping the ends of the table.
"She wanted to protect you all, this was the only way", he spoke calmly as if he hadn't just dropped a fucking bombshell.
