Teenage Fever // Jude Bellingham

56

I felt what seemed to be a knuckle nudge my leg right below my knee, causing my eyes to snap open — although i immediately wanted to shut them again when i met eyes with the person i least wanted to see right now, even if it sounded harsh.

"Gio?" I spoke just below a confused whisper; he wasn't supposed to be here right now.

I didn't want him. I needed Jude.

Gio's presence probably just made it worse in this moment, considering he was partly a reason why this was happening.

Not that any of this was his fault, or not that i never wanted to be around him again after this, but it'd be best if he'd just leave.

"Are you... uh... okay?" He asked, cautiously eyeing me while not moving a muscle since he probably didn't understand what was wrong with me and didn't want to risk making things worse.

"You need to leave." I shook my head, "please."

I didn't dare to look up at him, scared of his reaction to my harsh request. My breathing got unsteady again, and i tried to focus on the little heart drawn onto the sole of my sneaker by my baby brother.

"Oh." He cleared his throat awkwardly, and if i weren't in this state i'd laugh at his inability to handle messy emotional situations. "Do you want me to get Jude, or..."

"He's... on his way." I mumbled, still not looking up at him. I hated this. He didn't deserve this.

"Okay." He exhaled, and i heard him standing back up from his squatted position in front of me, "look, i don't want to make it worse, but... is this about what you were looking at earlier? Because —"

"Gio, please. Later." I finally glanced at him, my eyes probably bloodshot from all the crying.

He had a mixture of pity and hurt in his eyes when he looked at me. My heart stung a little, but i couldn't let myself care about this right now. I needed to make sure i'd be getting better at first.

He nodded, rolling his lips into his mouth before looking back at me ne last time — his face seeming as if he was quietly saying sorry — before exiting the bathroom.

As soon as the door closed, i felt the next wave of panic wash over me.

As embarrassing as it was, i had to audibly whimper in relief when the next thing i felt was two arms gently pulling me into a embrace.

The suffocating feeling in my chest died down when it collided with his, my hands clutching the material of his shirt as i tried suppressing my sobs.

Comfort and the feeling of being safe overcame my body, and i could finally think somewhat clear again.

"You're okay." Jude's soft voice muttered into my ear , his grasp tightening around me for a moment in an attempt to convince both me and himself from his words before letting loose again to give me enough space to recover into a normal breathing pattern.

"I'm trying." I sniffled, hiding my face further into his frame; probably staining the black fabric with my make up.

"I know you are, Tia." I felt him nod, his chin resting on top of my head. We were probably looking so embarrassingly dramatic hugging on a bathroom floor while i sat on him halfway.

"I'm—", sob, "sorry."

"There's nothing you have to be sorry for, baby, it's alright i promise." He soothingly stroked my back.

"No but it's not." I shook my head, somehow pulling it together to start ranting at him.

"I didn't want to ruin your day, but Emma sent me this — this link, and it's bad... god it's horrible. They're saying — well, Bree, is saying that Gio and I—" i took a breath, "that we're having an affair, behind your back, and with all of that foul stuff included... and i feel so so bad because what if it really does seem like that? I mean obviously it's not true but what if—"

"Tiana." Jude pulled back from me.

My gaze was still fixated on the floor, and he moved my chin upwards to force me to look at him, but i refused and closed my eyes.

Was he disappointed? Maybe shocked? Humiliated? Mad, he was probably mad.

"I'm sorry, i promise there never happened anything. I'd never. I swear it, i love you." I babbled in a embarrassing attempt to make this look any better.

"Hey." I shook my head. "Tia, i know... it's just another lie made up to try and tear us apart."

I snapped my eyes open. "You're not mad?"

"What? No." He furrowed his eyebrows, eyes flickering between mine as if searching for an answer to his next question; his soft touches on my neck sweet in contrast to the realization that would hit me like a train after the words left his lips.

"You're not comparing me to him, are you?"

y'all are being fed rn so enjoy it while it lasts
this is so fine line coded btw hihi