To Love the Dawn

27

Dahil sa pagiging hands on ko kay Tahlia, nakalimutan ko na may business nga pala ako. Hindi ko na mahingan ng pabor si Pia dahil abala na rin siya sa trabaho niya. Si David naman busy rin.

Even though David was busy, when it comes to Tahlia, grabe rin ang nilalaan niyang time. Sa tuwing uuwi siya, maglilinis siya ng katawan at magdi-disinfect bago lumapit kay Tahlia. Kapag nahahawakan niya na ang anak namin, parang ayaw niya nang bitawan. Pinagbibigyan ko naman dahil minsan niya nalang makasama si Tahlia sa sobrang busy niya.

"Sola, please don't pull the sheets. It's cold..." Now I feel bad for making David topless. I wanted to feel his body heat. "Nilalamig ka pa?"

"Hindi na. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pull the sheets." Humigpit ang hawak ko sa braso niyang nakapulupot sa akin.

"David? Anak?!" Napabangon si David sa sunod-sunod na katok. It was his mom's voice. Nang tingnan ko ang wall clock, saka ko lang napagtantong umaga na. "Open this door! I know you're with your bitch!"

Napatayo na rin ako sa narinig. David looked confused as he opened the door. When he saw how angry his mother was, he immediately stood in front of me, as if protecting me.

"Sinira ng tatay mo ang buhay ng anak ko, Sol!" Dinuro-duro niya ako. Kaagad naman siyang pinigilan ni David. "Ano 'to? Sisirain mo rin ang buhay ng isa ko pang anak? I liked you, Sol. I was nice to you! You knew that your father impregnated my daughter and left her like nothing happened! Pero ano? Nilapitan mo pa rin ang pamilya namin! Alam mo ba kung ano ang nararamdaman ng anak ko sa tuwing nakikita ka niya? Pinapaalala mo sa kaniya ang sakit na nakuha niya sa demonyo mong tatay-"

"Mom, you don't have a single right to point and talk at Sola like that. Don't make me hate you-"

"Shut up, David! Pinili mo talaga ang babaeng 'to kaysa sa kapatid mo. Sol, kapatid mo ang anak ng kapatid ni David. Hindi ka ba nandiri? Hinayaan mo pa talagang mabuntis ka ng bunso ko?"

"T-tita, huli ko na rin naman p-po nalaman. Mahal ko po si David-"

"If you really love him, you would've left him the moment you found out that his sister has a kid with your father. Akala ko matalino kang babae, hindi pala... Sana naiintindihan mo ako, Sol. Lalo na ngayong isa ka na ring ina." Agad na dinaluhan ni David ang mama niya nang mapaluhod ito. "Nagmamakaawa ako, Sol, kung hindi mo kayang layuan ang mga anak ko... Mahalin mo nalang si David nang lubos at huwag ka na munang magpakita sa ate niya."

"Inna, let's go." Pumasok na rin sa kuwarto ang daddy ni David. "Baka kung mapaano ka pa. Hindi rin magandang nagsisigawan tayo rito habang natutulog ang anak nila. Sol, sana naiintindihan mo kung saan nanggagaling ang asawa ko. Pasensya ka na."

Napatango nalang ako habang tulala pa rin. Kumilos lamang ako nang marinig ang paghikbi ng sariling anak. Kinarga ko kaagad si Tahlia at nagtungo na muna sa sala. Maya-maya ay lumabas na rin ang mag-asawa. Hinatid sila ni David sa labas ng unit.

When David entered the unit, I knew he was looking for me. As our eyes met, he rushed to me. I gave Tahlia to her yaya, so David and I could talk. I wasn't expecting his mom to come at me like that. When Yaya and Tahlia went inside the room, David caged me in a hug.

"I'm sorry. You didn't deserve all the bad things my mom said. And it was my choice to love you, to choose you. Wala kang kasalanan. Bago pa natin nalaman ang totoo, nagmamahalan na tayo, Sol." In the end, it was his assurance that mattered the most.

Makalipas ang ilang buwan, natapos na rin ang bahay namin. Lumipat na kami ro'n. Kasama pa rin namin si Marinel. Nadagdag din si David ng mga kasambahay at security guards. Sa tingin ko naman ay hindi iyon kailangan dahil mahigpit naman ang security ng lugar namin.

Lumalaki na rin si Tahlia kaya kailangan na rin talaga naming lumipat sa bahay. Parang kailan lang ay maliit pa si Tahlia, ngayon ay ika-anim na buwan niya na. Matalinong bata si Tahlia, six months old palang siya ay nakakabigkas na siya ng ibang salita tulad ng "mama" at "papa."

"Puwede ba siyang kargahin, sis?" tanong ni Pia sa akin. Inilipat ko sa kaniyang mga braso si Tahlia. Nakita ko kung paano naluha si Pia. Tinawan naman siya ni Markus. "Ang cute niya, 'no? Kapag nagkaanak tayo, baka umiyak ako!"

"Ngayon palang nga umiiyak ka na-"

"Markus!" pagsuway ni Pia sa lalaki. Natawa na lamang ang lalaki. "Busy kasi si Clara, so she couldn't come here. But she asked us to bring her gifts. Markus, saan mo nilagay 'yung gifts?"

"I gave it to David."

"Thank you sa inyo and sa gifts. Kung nagugutom na kayo, puwede naman kayong kumain. Ready na 'yung foods sa lamesa."

Habang nililibang nina Pia at Markus si Tahlia, hinanap ko naman si David. He was having a talk with Ethan. Nagbabalak kasing mag-apply si David sa hospital nila Ethan. Si Ethan naman ay sinasabing ipapasok na si David ngayon palang.

Tumabi ako kay David at yumakap sa beywang niya. Ethan smiled at me. I smiled back. Umakbay naman si David sa akin at humalik sa sentido ko. We stayed like that while they were talking. It felt like when we were still young. We didn't care that much about relationships. But we always had each other's backs.

"You two make a good couple," Ethan commented.

"Well, if only this woman right here didn't break up with me," pang-aasar ni David. Kinurot ko nalang ang tagiliran niya. "Please take good care of Qamari. She may be strong but she has weaknesses too."

"I love her, dude. It sounds cheesy but I won't be this Ethan without Qamari."

"You think you'll never fall out of love?" It was weird for David to ask that. "Just a question."

"Yeah, I don't think so. I'm not capable of doing that if it's my Aia we're talking about. Why are you asking that kind of question? Dude, it's not like you're falling out of love right now." Silence beat us when Ethan said the last sentence.

"Wait, are you actually..." I couldn't finish my sentence. Instead, I left them. I heard David calling my name. David followed me to our bedroom. The moment I faced him, my tears began to fall. "You're giving up..."

"Solana, let's be real. The spark that we felt before is no longer there. But that doesn't mean that my love for you died too. And no, I'm not giving up." Hinawi ko ang kamay niya nang subukan niya akong hawakan. "Sol..."

"I'm tired again, David. Let's just... take a break. But let's not forget our responsibilities as Theia's parents. If this is just you, making some excuse... Kung napipilitan ka lang manatili sa tabi ko dahil may anak tayo, puwede naman akong umalis. I can visit Tahlia nalang. Just take good care of her. That's all I'm asking from you."

"Sola, I swear it's not about Tahlia. I'm staying because of you and our kid. I loved you for years, do you think I'd just wake up one day and my love's gone?" He shook his head in disbelief. "Let's not... drift away from each other. We waited for so long. We suffered long enough. I won't waste those."

I felt so weak when he made his way to me. With a single caress on my neck, I folded. David hugged my waist with his free arm. His hand went up to my face and wiped off the tears. When he finished doing that, he didn't waste any time. His kisses felt so soft and warm.

"Remember what I said? I'll propose to you when I become a doctor. By then, I'll be a better man for you. I'll be worthy of your love," he whispered, making our lips touch a bit. "Te quiero cada día un poquito más, Dawn."

__________________________________