Under the Stars (Tonjuarez Series I)

UTS 14

Chapter 14

Minulat ko ang mata at ang unang tumambad sa akin ay ang pamilyar na kisame. I tried to blink multiple times, trying to process everything.

Panaginip ba ang lahat? Sana panaginip nalang.

I blackout because of exhaustion and extreme emotion I am feeling, I still can't fathom what's happening. Ramdam ko pa rin ang pagod, emotionally and physically. Pero hindi iyon ang importante sa akin ngayon.

Sinubukan kong bumangon sa kama, nailagay na nila ako sa loob ng kwarto ko. I don't even have any idea kung gabi pa ba o umaga na. Gusto ko lang lumabas at malaman ang balita kay Caden.

Just the thought of him pained me.

Naglakad ako palabas ng kwarto, ang balak ko sana ay bababa para hanapin sila daddy. Nang may marinig akong ingay mula sa kwarto nila, nakabukas ang pinto kaya tumuloy ako roon. Hindi pa ako nakalapit, alam kong may pinapanood silang balita sa tv.

Pumasok ako sa loob, nadatnan ko silang nakapang tulog pa, at tutok na tutok sa balita. I tried to look, and what I saw made my stomach churned.

It was a picture of Caden, in a hospital bed.

"Youngest son of J Prime Holdings' owner, Wancho Tonjuarez was put in a coma. The family decided to migrate to the U.S. to provide more advanced medication for the patient."

Akala ko wala nang ilalala ang nararamdaman ko, meron pa pala. Wala akong ibang nagawa kundi ang tumitig sa balita sa tv. Naramdaman ko si Mommy na lumapit sa akin, hinawakan niya ang magkabila kong balikat.

"Aalis muna sila anak, aalis muna si Caden." paliwanag nito sa akin, I suddenly struggled to breath, my eyes heated because of tears.

"He's still in coma?" tanong ko.

"Oo, anak." she sounded so sorry for saying that, I bit my lower lip to keep myself from crying.

"Sa kwarto po muna ako,"

"Yara..."

"Babalik po muna ako."

Umalis na ako agad, ayokong makita ulit nila akong iiyak. Mabilis akong naglalakad papasok ng kwarto ko, I closed and locked the door.

The moment I pushed the lock button, my eyes started to water. I held on to the doorknob, to still hold myself from losing balance.

My sob intensifies, I covered my mouth to keep making sounds. Tuluyan na akong napaupo sa sahig, wala ng natitirang lakas. Hot tears blocked my vision as I tried to cover my mouth. My heart aches so much.

The thought of Caden leaving, unconscious. Alam ko, alam ko na, na hindi ko na siya makikita muli ng matagal. I can't process that reality.

Hindi ko lubos maisip, na sa isang iglap, wala na siya sa tabi ko.

And the fact that I am the reason, with everything happening right now. Ako dapat ang naaksidente, kung hindi ko siya hinila sa gilid, kung hindi ko siya tinulak ay baka hindi siya nalaglag!

Ako dapat iyon, ako na lang dapat.

Tuloy-tuloy ang tulo ng aking luha, akala ko wala na akong iiyak. Marami pa pala.

He always tries to protect me, he is always by my side. That was the only time I needed to help him, to protect him pero hindi ko nagawa!

I blame myself, and I will always blame myself. I didn't do him any good, and it breaks my heart so much.

I will pay for this, I will surely make myself pay for this.

The pain didn't leave me, even in a single moment. They already migrated to the States, I never saw him again after that. I kept myself close to him. I feel like I don't even deserve to be with him. I don't deserve him.