Haikyuu - Second Best Choice (Iwaizumi x Female Reader)

Chapter Thirty-Four - I Don't Like Tantrums

Y/N's POV

Yuji wore his sad face, but I am not sure if it was because of the humiliation from losing or because he cared about me and still had some dignity left in him. As a matter of fact, I have my doubts whether it's even real or just a sick way to manipulate me into folding right back into him.

"I don't think we have anything to talk about, Yu- Terushima," I stand up from my seat, closing the difference in height that held that spine-chilling feeling.

"Really? Terushima?" He pushes his head closer to mine as if trying to decipher something in my eyes.

I knew he would hate the sound of his family name, no one ever calls him that way. I always assumed he liked being called by his first name because it added to his fun-outgoing persona. Now that I'm able to step back and see things from a better perspective, I know it's much deeper than that.

"Let's just..." He steps back when he notices the cold glare and intimidating stance he had been holding, then runs his hand through his hair in desperation, "Talk it out." He says more calmly.

"It's funny," I say almost laughing, "I only seem to get your attention when you want my forgiveness or when I'm taking my clothes off."

"That's not true," He shakes his head.

"Yes, it is," Our words overlapped. He seems shocked I expected that response.

I am as desperate as he is, however, they are for the wrong reasons. Whereas I can't wait to put distance between the two, he is grasping into strands for I, for some miracle, to fall to his knees.

"But I love you."

The sentence takes me back, however, I should have expected it too. He is so used to buying me back using that one sentence. It's just his I love yous no longer hold the same power over me. They don't make my heart accelerate, nor does my tummy feel like there is a ticking bomb inside that could explode at any moment. No matter how genuine Yuji might think it is, it just doesn't make me feel that way anymore. Not like with Hajime.

"Then why is it...!" My voice gains volume. I have to stop when I choke on my words before continuing. I swallow all the rage stuck in my throat, "Why is it..." This time it's a lower voice filled with hurt as tears begin to form in my eyes blurring everything but him. His stupid-sappy-puppy eyes are the only thing I can clearly see. I have to fight the urge to not crumble, "You made me cry so many times, Yuji?"

He lifts his arms, extends them towards me slowly. However, I don't let them touch me. I slap them away. That surprises him too.

"So don't... don't come and tell me you loved me because lying is the least you can do."

As I say that, flashes of everything we've undergone go through my head. The sleepless nights filled with alcohol and marihuana that we so desperately craved, craved as hard and deep as each other's bodies. Of course I also remember all the heartbreaks. Each one more painful than the last as if he were playing a sick game of how much hatred could fill my heart before it exploded.

I fell for Yuji hard. Loved him harder than he ever deserved. In return, I got hurt harder than I ever deserved. I put every ounce of effort to keep the facade for the two of us, or at least that's what I told myself, because the truth was, we were both in a pot too hot for either of us to handle.

"But I'm not lying," He doesn't put his hands down, maybe he is expecting for his words to do some witchery on me and pull me towards him magically, "I miss you so much, I never felt safe around anyone. You were always so warm. It- I- I'm sorry!" He finally says, "I fucked up, okay? I did. I- I'll make it up, so tell me what I have to do for you to forgive me?"