Unconditionally (BOOK 3)

Face to Phone

"Hi, angel." I was happy to see Felix's face even if it was through a phone screen. We've been resorting to FaceTime since he's left. At the end of the day, I'm just glad we're finally in the same time zone; doing this in New York was a challenge.

"Hey." Felix smiled softly, finally getting into bed.

"How was filming today?"

"It was a little tiring, but only because we were finishing up an episode."

"How many have you finished?"

"Four."

"And how many are left?"

"Sixteen." I paused, trying to do the math in my head. "So that's four more months pretty much."

I bit my lip, hating that I have to wait that long. But I'd be the biggest asshole on the planet if I didn't support him. I just feel like this decision was all so sudden. He had never mentioned wanting to be an actor, nor has he ever talked about auditioning for anything. It was all a big shock to me, but I was never against it. Although, the idea of waiting months to see him again is excruciating. Especially when I had no time to prepare for this whatsoever.

"So you won't be home for your birthday?" He sighed and shook his head. "I wish I could come see you."

"Me too. I miss you."

"I miss you more." There was no loving joy in my voice as I spoke. I hated being away from him like this. But at least I finally know how much longer I'll have to wait.

"What have you been doing?" I know one of Felix's concerns about us being apart was the possibility of a relapse. I don't blame him for being nervous; I'm all alone in this apartment every day so it would be too easy. But I've genuinely had no desire whatsoever.

"I was with Yeonjun and Jeongin earlier."

"That's good." He smiled, happy to hear I wasn't locking myself away from society. "What'd you guys do?"

"We just walked around the city and shopped a bit. Nothing too special."

I kept my word and never told Felix about my conversation with Yeonjun. I owe him after keeping things quiet about Taemin. I'm surprised Jeongin never said a word about it either.

"How's work been?"

"It's been good. A little boring, but I'm not overwhelmed like I used to be." Now that I've worked at the museum for a few months, I've gotten the hang of it. I used to bombard Seulgi with questions almost every day, but now it's her asking me for help. She's fully capable of doing her job, but she respects my opinion. I'm grateful that I get to do what I do. I never wanted to stop pursuing a career in art, but there were times when I didn't believe it was possible. I'm truly proud of myself for how far I've come.

Felix stayed quiet and continued to stare with a sad look on his face. I knew what he was thinking so I didn't feel the need to ask. This is also what happens every few days so there was no need for me to question it. He misses me and I miss him just as much, if not more.

"Love you." He whispered, pulling his blanket up to his chin.

"Love you too, angel." He looked sadder than usual so maybe I should ask this time. "You okay?" I asked sweetly. There's nothing I wish I could do more than to hold him in my arms and ask him that in person.

"I was just thinking about something."

"Anything you wanna talk about?"

"Do we even celebrate anniversaries anymore? We have like," he counted on his fingers, thinking of the number, "four."

"How would we have that many?" I smiled.

"Well there's November 5th, which was the very first one. Then there's April 14th, which is the first time we got back together. Then there's November 17th of last year, which is technically the one now. But then there's also June 11th where I asked you to marry me so is there a fiancé anniversary? I'm not sure which one it is." I looked at him fondly as he listed off all the dates that hold some significance to our relationship. I thought it was so cute how he remembered all of them. "What?" He suddenly became shy and hid his face under the sheets.

"You're adorable, I love you." I smiled.

"Love you too," he quickly replied, "but help me, which one is it?"

"That's all you, babe. You pick."

"How about...all of them?"

"All of them?" I laughed as he nodded with the purest closed smile on his face. But then my own smile faded once I realized why he was originally upset about the topic. "Damn, so we're really missing another birthday and our current technical one year." The right one is November 17th, let's be honest with ourselves now.

"Yeah." He sighed, returning to a sad state of mind.

"Baby, are you sure I can't come and visit you? Not even on a lunch break or something? You know I'd make the drive and take off work. I just really miss you."

I wish I had the guts to take a chance and see what would happen. But I keep imagining myself getting to a front gate, only to be told I can't go inside because I'm not authorized. I get second hand embarrassment just thinking about it; how humiliating.

"I can ask." I could tell the thought of it stressed him out immediately; I don't blame him. It's his first role, he's not an established actor, he's practically a nobody with zero experience whatsoever, and he's trying to prove that he isn't just a pretty face. I'm sure he feels like he's not in a position to ask for things - like visitors.

"Don't if it's too much, I don't want to stress you out."

"I know, but I want to see you."

I paused to think of an idea, hoping I'd come up with a solution. "What if I just came to the hotel? I don't need to come on set because then I won't be able to spend time with you - that would probably stress you out even more actually. Would that work?"

Felix smiled and held onto the pillow that clearly wasn't one of the hotel's. Yes, he took mine with him since that's as good as it's going to get for now.

"It should."

"Then I think you might have an extra special surprise for your birthday." I winked and smiled as he started to blush.

"Really?"

"I miss you too much, I can't go another day without you." I dramatically said, resting the back of my hand on my forehead. He laughed in the most adorable way possible and hid his face as his cheeks grew red. "I love you so much."

"I love you too." He tried to control his smile, but it was nearly impossible.

I'll finally get to see my angel.