Protector (HotchxMaleOC) (Book2)

Interlude III

Trigger Warning: mentions of nonconsensual actions, rape/sexual assault, as well as domestic emotional abuse

*Aaron*

I need to take a step back from everything. I haven't truly processed what happened with EVERYTHING at DOMINIC or from the blind date I went on with Jacob. Unfortunately, I'm taking out my bad/frustrating experience on my team. Though all unintentional, it still happens, and I catch the way some of them react.

Spencer. Garcia.

I guess it should be done in timeline order. Start in the past and work my way to the present-day events. It'll take time to process it all. Jack's at least spending the night at JJ's house for a sleepover with Henry. It'll be good for him, and it helps me a little bit with this processing situation. I have no idea how I'll react to it all, but at least if I end up lashing out, Jack is nowhere near me to witness it or be involved in it.

I sat on the couch with some whiskey and just started to think back on the events of my life. To process. 

Haley. Others have made comments on how, now looking back on some aspects of my relationship[/marriage, Haley was abusive. Never really physically, but emotionally. 

*Ex:

     - She knew what field of work I wanted to go into. She agreed and understood. Once we got married she started to change her opinion on it. She began to get upset about small things dealing with my job. Like the fact that for cases I'd have to travel on occasion and I wouldn't be home for several days. When I get a call about a case, I stop what I'm doing and go because people's live are on the line or maybe they need a profiler's out look/insight on the situation. 

         > Maybe she tried to change it with suggestions we grow our family. Something I've wanted to do anyway. 

- After Jack was born she used my job against my parenting skills. Saying how I love my job more than my son. That I never want to be around him/spend time with him. 

-  We got a divorce because of my "dedication" because I didn't want the 9-5 office job I was put on while I couldn't work with the team. While I was on suspension/probation. 

- Throughout our relationship when I brought something up about trying something new, be it our sex life or in general, I got shot down. She refused to hear my side/reasoning/explanation. It wasn't her idea so it was an automatic no. 

- She blamed me for them having to go into witness protection. My fault. I must've "done it on purpose because I don't care about my son." Gave me "an excuse to not see him." Even though I was terrified of Foyet getting to them. 

*Reasons why: 

  - She needs to be the center of attention. 

        > Reason why she was in theater. 

        > She only agreed to my job probably assuming I'd not like it in the long run because it kept me from her. Kept my attention elsewhere. 

        > My attention got worse after we got married because it was "half on her and half on my job." When Jack was born, my attention was then split "three ways". Never totally focused on her. 

 - The divorce was a threat at first hoping that I'd change my mind. Then it became reality as she tried to make Jack see that I was the "bad guy" in the situation.