When the lowest low's feel like an ocean
And you desperately trying to keep half your body above the raging sea
Then just you neck and shoulders
Then your head
Until finally you are just praying to have your nose or mouth out of the water
You get a few breaths of fresh air
Though even those where few and far between
When you finally sink
Deep down
Way down
Into the depths of your mind
Where your heart and soul have no standing
Their voices quite and still
Where everything is hazy
Nothing is important
And you cling onto death like a lover
Hope they have everything to solve you
Holding so they don't leave like everything else
Hoping for reprive
Reprive from the suffering
The silence
The void
Then slowly to ascend the turbulent waters
With the help of a lifevest you discovered
The world becomes less heavy
And you start celebrating
Think finally you can breathe
Have fun
Dance
Have the energy to care
But then you only make it so your face is out of the water
And you spent so much time in the deep water it become your home
Your safe house
Your source of comfort
How to feel everything the nothing
Dropping
Sinking
That what I feels like
When life keeps throwing more and more at you
But you revel in the thrashing deep waters
Revel in the familiar feel of the waves
Revel in the knowing
Revel
I always believe drowning was the most painful way to die
Because your body's rejects it till the very last second
It thrashes
Pulls
Holds
Breathe
Life
Hope
But now my brain and body welcome the hurt
The pain
the suffering
It finally dissolves into the water
Become the particles that fly around
Then never seen again
