she moved on
or so she said
but
she still holds her breath
when she sees someone who looks like you
when she sees your car
when she hears your name
while these things to anyone else aren't fully attached to you
to her, they were irrevocably intertwined
she still can't go down that road
or sit in that parking lot
for the memories are too vivid
too raw
she still hears your voice
echoing in her mind
so clear it is as if you are still here
when she's about to make a decision
or
when she sees a couple
or
when she sees cars
she still writes messages
but
she'll never send them
so instead she turns it into poetry
so that way
something beautiful can come out of this sorrow
she still flinches at your name
when she hears it
a part of her afraid for she isn't ready to face you
another part jumps excitedly because it's missed the sound of it
she still gets angry and frustrated with herself
for holding on
for longing
for letting herself get caught up in the "what ifs"
yet she can't seem to let go
can't seem to move on
though she is trying
she will never be able to fully let go
for a piece of her heart no longer belonged to her
it was lost to you
